Rocktales
An annual holiday event traditionally held in Bridgeville, PA, just outside of Pittsburgh at the home of a carpenter. It is a reunion of friends and family who have basically been celebrating the decade of the 90's since the fucking thing ended. As the name implies, stories are oft regaled relating to this group's various affiliations with the east coast and regional rock scenes.
Heavy boozing, chain smoking and other Christmas cheer are the staple sustenance for this extravaganza of idiocy and awkward kinship, though occasionally the presence of a world class chef puts food more at the center. This themed happenstance of organized chaos typically is splattered with musical jamming, both video game and real, and is usually ruined by a corny, emotional speech given by one of the elders who clearly should have started drinking later or done the speech earlier. Most of the attendees either have no idea what he is talking about or simply don't care. It does, however, add a semblance of structure to things and provides fresh reasons for everyone to make fun of him.
The best thing about this event is the invitation. Folks all around the world look forward to that invitation coming in the mail so that they can truly feel the spirit of the season. Most of the time at the actual event is spent by the participants trying to get someone to take a stupid enough picture of them to get on the invitation for the following year.
Heavy boozing, chain smoking and other Christmas cheer are the staple sustenance for this extravaganza of idiocy and awkward kinship, though occasionally the presence of a world class chef puts food more at the center. This themed happenstance of organized chaos typically is splattered with musical jamming, both video game and real, and is usually ruined by a corny, emotional speech given by one of the elders who clearly should have started drinking later or done the speech earlier. Most of the attendees either have no idea what he is talking about or simply don't care. It does, however, add a semblance of structure to things and provides fresh reasons for everyone to make fun of him.
The best thing about this event is the invitation. Folks all around the world look forward to that invitation coming in the mail so that they can truly feel the spirit of the season. Most of the time at the actual event is spent by the participants trying to get someone to take a stupid enough picture of them to get on the invitation for the following year.
When the hell is Rocktales going to be this year? Remember when she fell down the steps at Rocktales? OMG, the invitations for Rocktales are here!
Rocktales by The Jigg is up December 3, 2010
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