Paranokia

Paranokia

(noun)

A state of anxiety that afflicts cellphone users and results in the following behaviours:

- Many people simultaneously checking their phones when a message arrival tone is heard. Generally occurs in a public/crowded place.

- Frequent checking that keylock is enabled and that a phone isn't accidentally pocket dialing someone, especially if that person is currently being gossiped about

- Constantly checking for new text messages or emails, even though you haven't heard or felt one arrive since you last checked

- Having left your phone behind at home or the office, the feeling of absolute certainty that you are missing vitally important messages and/or booty calls

Having once accidentally pocket dialed the boyfriend of the girl he was having backseat sex with, Jeff's paranokia ensured that he switched his phone off during subsequent engagements.

Paranokia by Sir Garence March 10, 2009

scantron paranoia 

the feeling one experiences when taking a test on a scantron and getting the same answer multiple times in a row; applies to students

I got five B's in a row on my scantron, one of them HAD to have been wrong. I hate scantron paranoia.

scantron paranoia by iCoinedThat1199 December 28, 2009

Boner Paranoia 

When you have a boner and everything looks fuckable (extremely horny)

Bro, I have boner paranoia. I'm so down to fuck my 45 year old Hispanic house keeper.

Boner Paranoia by Martin Luber King October 21, 2016

Peter Paranoia 

One who will make false accusations about people and be unable to back them up.

They will convince themselves that the accusations are real, and will never admit that it was made up.

Peter Paranoia claimed that Joe was stealing all of his tools from his shed, then Peter Paranoia accused somebody of urinating in his chocolate biscuits and lemonade.

What a cuckoo!

Peter Paranoia by meds4u January 15, 2010

Marvin The Paranoid Android 

A cynical robot who doesn't think the best of most people. One of the main characters in "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy"

"Here I am, brain the size of a planet, and they ask me to open a door" - Marvin The Paranoid Android

Marvin The Paranoid Android by Mr Beeblebrox February 10, 2012

last.fm paranoia 

Stopping an embarrassing song right before the halfway point so that it won't scrobble and show on your last.fm profile.

Alice: I had better stop this K-pop song; it's at 2:04 and the song is 4:25.
Bob: Sounds like you've got last.fm paranoia.

last.fm paranoia by Clayffer Johanson August 16, 2010

Paranormal 

Anything unexplainable by science. Anything supposedly thought to be the figment of imagination which cannot be proved by scientific means. Extra terrestrials and ghosts fit into this category. There is no proof that either do not exist. If you have ever seen anything you can't explain scientifically, then that is paranormal by definition.

There was a programme on the television about the paranormal, but they said it was for entertainment purposes only.

Paranormal by steamtram57 February 16, 2018