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Marion, IL

A town of 17,000 serving as the county seat of Williamson County in Southern Illinois. The town was originally a swamp, just like Orlando, again proving that "you can drain the swamp from the land, but not from the people." The town's mayor, Bob Butler, has been in office continuously since 1963 and is most likely a Federal plant, owing to the large Shawnee Forest National Park's collection of munitions, a General Dynamics Ordnance arms manufacturing plant which may produce as much as 30% of the nation's ammunition, a local FBI branch headquarters, and the United States Penitentiary, Marion (built in 1963) serving as a replacement for Alcatraz.

Other major employers (besides the Federal Government) include Pepsi MidAmerica, with a mansion for the owners, the reportedly "dickish" Crisp family, located directly behind the complex so they can more effectively lord over them; AISEN manufacturing where rednecks and Japanese collide in something resembling an imported game show; and several insurance companies, banks, and hotels, Marion acting as a traditional Midwestern pit-stop town between Chicago, St. Louis., Memphis, and other cities more notable and livable.
"When going to St. Louis, be sure to completely pass Marion, IL."

"I'm from Marion, IL, home to Marion High School where I learned to create a PowerPoint presentation."
by Strawberry ShortCult January 29, 2012
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Marion, Illinois

Home to the MHS Wildcats and the SI Miners, this overly-pretentious small town has been dubbed the "Hub of the Universe" by its aged mayor of 51 years. Sadly, this town has very little to offer in the form of entertainment, usually causing the youth to resort to drinking, drugs, or street racing. The best parts of the town include the Carnegie Library, Joe's Records, and the occasional weekend night spent at Marion Lake (ask a local about it's location).
Guy #1: "Hey man! Wanna go to Marion, Illinois this weekend?!?"
Guy #2: "Hell no! Why would we do that unless we're getting wasted or street racing?!?"
Guy #1: "Oh yeah, I totally forgot"
by nicktherushnut January 28, 2014
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Mario: Marios gonna make sure you never a-walk again. You took my a-speget now i-ma hit a your kneecaps backwords with a basball bat, WAHOO
Give me my speget or marios gonna do somthing very illegal
by HAHAnonono January 20, 2022
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Illogical Marian Assumption

An Illogical Marian Assumption, is my joke, on the Marian Assumption, a Christian doctrine, where The Virgin Mary, ascended to Heaven. It's also, a joke, on the, illogical assumption, a term, in logic.
The Devil's, Illogical Marian Assumption, is that, he hates The Virgin Mary, so he wants her, to join him, in Hell! A joke!
by I'mcrazy May 28, 2025
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