An individual who has gained many unattractive attributes because of working in the mall.
i.e. Walking at an inhuman pace, while destroying everything in your path, including: children fellow employees, the elderly, mall rats, and those who think that walking slower than a herd of stampeding turtles is a good pace, on Black Friday.
-Giving people who aren't your customers the finger, because you can't do it at work.
-Violently yelling at random people while finding a parking space and stalking anyone walking toward a car with your hazards on because your shift starts at 5 and it is now 4:57.
-Finding yourself in fights in the food court because someone took the last soy sauce packet at Panda Express.
-Tapping your foot and sighing entirely too much while you're in line at Starbucks, while simultaneously comparing your work ethic to theirs, out loud.
i.e. Walking at an inhuman pace, while destroying everything in your path, including: children fellow employees, the elderly, mall rats, and those who think that walking slower than a herd of stampeding turtles is a good pace, on Black Friday.
-Giving people who aren't your customers the finger, because you can't do it at work.
-Violently yelling at random people while finding a parking space and stalking anyone walking toward a car with your hazards on because your shift starts at 5 and it is now 4:57.
-Finding yourself in fights in the food court because someone took the last soy sauce packet at Panda Express.
-Tapping your foot and sighing entirely too much while you're in line at Starbucks, while simultaneously comparing your work ethic to theirs, out loud.
Liz: Holy shit did you see that?
Mark: What?
Liz: That girl just ran through here and didn't injure anyone.
Mark: She must be a malloyee.
Ali: Uhm, excuse me???
random pedestrian: Yea?
Ali: Yea, i was wondering if I could take your parking space.
random pedestrian: Well I got a long way to go, all the way across the lot.
Ali: WELL FUCK YOU THEN YOU FAR AWAY PARKER BASTARD!!!!!!!!
random pedestrian: holy shit. must be a malloyee
Mark: What?
Liz: That girl just ran through here and didn't injure anyone.
Mark: She must be a malloyee.
Ali: Uhm, excuse me???
random pedestrian: Yea?
Ali: Yea, i was wondering if I could take your parking space.
random pedestrian: Well I got a long way to go, all the way across the lot.
Ali: WELL FUCK YOU THEN YOU FAR AWAY PARKER BASTARD!!!!!!!!
random pedestrian: holy shit. must be a malloyee
by sulliwully86 January 28, 2009