Dolfy's phone guy. He usually calls him when he has a problem with something but refuses to fix it, even after a brief update.
Dolfy: I demand a cure for this ugliness. I'm fed up with being ugly.
Burgdorf: My Failure, I have no news on a cure. No one yet understands what caused this mutation. All attempts so far to restore us to our former glory have all failed.
Dolfy: No progress has been made?
Burgdorf: My Failure, you should speak with Koller.
Dolfy: Koller. Give me Koller. Koller, has any progress been made with curing our ugly problem?
Karl Koller: No.
Dolfy: Why not? There should be a way to cure us.
Koller: No, we can't be cured.
Dolfy: Yes we can, you idiot. The ugliness was inflicted on us and I believe our ugliness can be reversed.
Koller: Hold a moment. I'm receiving a note on our ugly problem. It says here we can't be cured. These mutations have permanently deformed us on a supramolecular scale. These mutations will continue to alter our appearance. Our voices are also damaged beyond repair.
Dolfy: Nothing but lame excuses from a bunch of incompetent dummies. I demand a cure. If you fail to cure us, I will hang you with this deformed phone. Unbelievable. They claim we can't be cured of our ugliness. Those are the same idiots who said the cake is a lie.
Burgdorf: My Failure, if you're so sure our ugly problem can be cured. Why haven't you actually come up with the solution yourself?
Dolfy: Back off.
Burgdorf: My Failure, I have no news on a cure. No one yet understands what caused this mutation. All attempts so far to restore us to our former glory have all failed.
Dolfy: No progress has been made?
Burgdorf: My Failure, you should speak with Koller.
Dolfy: Koller. Give me Koller. Koller, has any progress been made with curing our ugly problem?
Karl Koller: No.
Dolfy: Why not? There should be a way to cure us.
Koller: No, we can't be cured.
Dolfy: Yes we can, you idiot. The ugliness was inflicted on us and I believe our ugliness can be reversed.
Koller: Hold a moment. I'm receiving a note on our ugly problem. It says here we can't be cured. These mutations have permanently deformed us on a supramolecular scale. These mutations will continue to alter our appearance. Our voices are also damaged beyond repair.
Dolfy: Nothing but lame excuses from a bunch of incompetent dummies. I demand a cure. If you fail to cure us, I will hang you with this deformed phone. Unbelievable. They claim we can't be cured of our ugliness. Those are the same idiots who said the cake is a lie.
Burgdorf: My Failure, if you're so sure our ugly problem can be cured. Why haven't you actually come up with the solution yourself?
Dolfy: Back off.
by The Real Driller October 1, 2022