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Drunkenese 

The prevailing language of Alchoholopia and its prevailing Drunken Commonwealths. Considered by many as one of the easiest to learn and most universally popular of the languages, Drunkenese is still not considered a viable language credit in most accredited instututions of higher learning.

If you are unsure whether or not a speaker of an unfamiliar language is in actuality speaking Drunkanese, look for these tell-tale signs: Excessive salivating, repeated catch phrase quoting, propensity to trail off or tell stories that never really go anywhere, horizontalness, spontaneous projectile vomiting, and a tendency to overestimate audience's level of interest in speaker.

Speakers of Drunkenese are occasionally confused with having a degenerative brain disorder.

If you are interested in learning more about Drunkenese, check out a bottle of Royal Crown from your local liquor store and study, all night if you have to.
Man 1: "Hey...thees parteee izzz tha...shiiii...uhm...hey...man I just like totally downed uhm 5 Jager shots and...Im Rick James bitch!"

Man 2: "Im sorry. I dont speak Drunkenese. Where are your pants?"
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drunkenese 

(n.) <Capitalized> the language spoken by those who have consumed large enough quantities of alcohol to become legally intoxicated, usually marked by slurring or incomprehensibility of each word spoken

(adj.) of, relating to, or characterized by those who have consumed large enough quantities of alcohol to become legally intoxicated
Had the bum not spoken in his native dialect, Drunkenese, he may have more easily convinced the tourists to lend him a dollar.
drunkenese by Felix Doore November 2, 2008

Drunkenstein 

A person who gets so drunk that the can no longer hold conversations, talk normally or function like a normal human. Drunkenstein can usually only stiffly walk to the bar and order more booze in a language only a bartender will understand.

Drunkensteins tend to grunt and groan more frequently than normal drunks.

Drunkenstein has been known to say "Booze gooood, water baaad!"
Check out Drunkenstein heading back to the bar. I bet he's not ordering water!
Drunkenstein by Fritopia March 18, 2009

Drunkenstein 

State of alcohol intoxication where a person has been completely obliterated with an amount of alcohol that is extremely above his/her tolerance level. Exceedingly bad decision-making skills are prevalent, periods of functioning black-outs ensue, appearance includes but not limited to: pasty skin tone (due to severe dehydration), glazed over half-opened eyes, a swaying gait, standing is difficult and falling is pretty much guaranteed, disheveled hair (rats nest for females)… unfortunately this person thinks & acts like their overall appearance is way hotter than reality. Basically makes a complete ass out of him or herself… extreme moron activities are a given. A drunkenstein will bulldoze blindly over anything and everyone in their path without acknowledgment (basically like Frankenstein would). Attitude & activities of a drunkenstein will often push people around them to the point where they want to kick the drunkenstein's ass.
Examples of activities while in this state: drinking and dialing / texting your friends or flavor(s) and leaving overly loving or rude and nasty, slurred, unintelligible messages ("I love you more than you know" or "hey cock-sucking whore"). A drunkenstein, will fight with friends or strangers… pushing buttons to start a fight (for no explainable reason?). Tackle and wreste people down or destroy others personal property. Smack people in the genitals and think it's funny. Expose nipples, cooch or cock to anyone - thinking they actually want to and should see it. Tongue kiss with same-sex friend (and are not gay/lesbian). Dance with him/herself in a mirror and think they're dancing with an actual partner. Take off on a drunk-run, not sure where to, but just run for miles (Forest Gump?). Pee their pants (in public). OR pee on partner and say they're marking their territory. Pee on furniture thinking it’s the toilet and then actually try to find the flusher. A drunkenstein would crawl in to bed with friends' significant other or mom/dad and spoon/snuggle them. Dine & dash (unknowingly?) or run from taxicabs after not paying. Face-plant falls - stitches required… any type of fall (gait issues). Beer goggle with EXTREMELY regrettable hook ups.
Drunkenstein by P. Stephens September 23, 2008

drunkenness 

How heavily an individual is intoxicated/drunk and forthcoming consequences as a result
Man, my drunkenness is starting to get the better of me; I want to pork your sister.
drunkenness by bantaclause January 27, 2015

drunkanese 

Language of drunk people. To slur normal words beyond recognition. To be Scottish after 3pm.
me mum speaks drunkanese after a fifth of whiskey.
drunkanese by DirkNiggla September 19, 2003

Drunkness monster

When a quiet nice person turns into a raging loony when he/she is intoxicated.
Matt is usually the nicest person to be around, but he drank a bottle of jack last night and smashed a dead cat over his brothers windshield. He is such a Drunkness Monster.
Drunkness monster by gchytuvhj January 26, 2009
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