A peculiar subvariant of the fatbeard genus. A dragynn is primarily composed of 90% lard, 5% extraneous fiber (or 'hair'), and 5% bitter, bitter tears. Dragynns' natural habitants include dimly-lit basements and bedrooms and tarpaper shacks. Their diet mainly comprises anything which will stand still long enough. Dragynns constitute an an invaluable natural resource, which if properly processed and rendered, could make the USA independent of all soap imports. A single dragynn if properly prepared can feed a family of four for at least two years and moves are afoot to breed these shy beasts on a commercial scale, most likely using adapted veal crates to keep their distinctive flesh a desirable pasty white.
by The International Wool Secretariat January 14, 2005
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