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fucking the dog in the ass 

A person who just can't get his shit together and seems to fuck up everything he or she can their hands on. The only thing they are good at is fucking the dog in the ass.
Russ was such a moron at work, all he was good for was FUCKING THE DOG IN THE ASS.

Fuck A Dog In The Ass And Call It Tuesday 

An expression used to express a mistake being made
John: "Hey make sure you don't eat that piece of metal!" John 2: "Oh I already did." John: "Well Fuck A Dog In The Ass And Call It Tuesday!"