Ditchster
Another name for a dopehead pizza cook; the guy that makes the pizzas. Working the make line is like working the ditch you see? It's a dirty job, and often looked down upon, but somebody's got to do it. Usually this person is known as a ditchster. It's really just another name for your common high school dopehead loser who works at the local pizza joint. He (or She) probably doesn't use deodorant, shave, or wash their hands after using the restroom, or scratching their crotch before he makes your pie. This type generally has a real "give a fuck" attitude toward life. Yet when one knows how to work the ditch, it usually guarantees an indefinite minimal level of employment. I'm sure this description could also apply to many other lowly food service positions involving significant drudgery. But they are all usually habitual drug user as well.
I was once a delivery driver at my local Pizza Hut, you see, and I happened the chance to interact with the local ditchster there. He would usually have this half-sick smile on his face, reminiscent of Rocky Balboa, as he dived his bare hands into trays full of slimy "Canadian Bacon", and Italian Sausage along with other toppings. You knew he didn't really like his job and was constantly nervous about getting busted for any stupid thing by the jerk manager. He couldn't hardly wait for a chance to ditch the make line for a quick trip to the walk-in freezer or to take the trash out back behind the dumpster for a quick hit off his weed pipe. You knew he never could really take his mind off that sack of kind bud in his pocket waiting for him. It was kind of the motivating factor in his life you know? It kept him going.
Ditchster by NickelDimeQuarterHalfDollar April 22, 2010
