Made by Pfizer in collaboration with The Onion News Network, Despondex is the first drug designed to treat the symptoms of excessive perkiness. It can prevent loud joyful squeals when a friend calls, Christmas caroling, costume parties, talking in line at a grocery store, community potlucks, excessive hugging, and smiles.
Are you annoyingly happy?
Despondex could be right for you.
If you are in a good mood occasionally that is normal but if you have a persistant positive outlook on life you should ask your doctor about Despondex.
Now you too can waste a night sitting on the couch with your friends or family watching a TV show no one enjoys.
Despondex prevents happiness better than watching the news, considering man's impact on nature, checking your bank balance, and thinking about how old you are and how little you have accomplished.
Despondex could be right for you.
If you are in a good mood occasionally that is normal but if you have a persistant positive outlook on life you should ask your doctor about Despondex.
Now you too can waste a night sitting on the couch with your friends or family watching a TV show no one enjoys.
Despondex prevents happiness better than watching the news, considering man's impact on nature, checking your bank balance, and thinking about how old you are and how little you have accomplished.
by ericri September 10, 2009
Get the Despondex mug.The stage name of the up and coming Miami-based trans entertainer who deftly skewers the quirky and deranged Governor of Florida.
The talented Ron DeSpandex has really nailed down the moves and expressions of DeSantis in a way that has caused periodic apoplectic rage to erupt from His Royal Piousness.
by Dr Bunnygirl May 18, 2023
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by BrandonWalsh April 11, 2014
Get the Despondent mug.A mental illness where everything you think of has a sexual and/or inappropriate meaning. It is also known to bring random fits of laughter and psychotic voices that no one can replicate!
by Wing Chang July 1, 2004
Get the Mental Dysponexia mug.by Mr. Rainbow Sunshine February 25, 2009
Get the Despoedespmnobes mug.Johnny was despondent because his IQ was 4.
by Fred Jung. October 17, 2003
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Girl-hey what you up to (sent 2:00pm)
Guy-nutin much kickin back at my casa btw sorry about my Desponse (sent 4:27 pm)
Girl-it's ok I was gonna invite you to the movies but we just got back from seeing it
Guy-oh. Damn
Girl-hey what you up to (sent 2:00pm)
Guy-nutin much kickin back at my casa btw sorry about my Desponse (sent 4:27 pm)
Girl-it's ok I was gonna invite you to the movies but we just got back from seeing it
Guy-oh. Damn
by Shainsworth of VTA March 30, 2009
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