Bagel

When someone fucks something up really bad or “screws the pooch”.

Guy1: Did you see joe talking to that stacked French girl? He shit his pants mid conversation.
Guy2: Yeah it was rough to watch, that was a real bagel on his part.
Guy1: Yeah he bageled that shit for sure

by Dantony milne November 22, 2020

nerd bagel

What your mother calls you when you’re laughing to much at her because you are weird.

Ex:
Mom: *rests arm on puzzle then knocks puzzle off table*

Me: *laughs while crying*
Her: *glares*
Me: are you gonna put your arms back on the table?
Her: no.
Me:why?
Her: because my daughters a nerd bagel.

by EmmersWasHere August 31, 2019

Bagel Rizz

Bagel rizz is something only a stupid mf named Samad would attempt to pull off. It includes the act of offering to buy a bitch a bagel in hopes to pipe. Bagel rizz has a 0% success rate and always ends in being laughed at in public.

Nahh no way this stupid mf tried bagel rizz on that bih

by DontBeatWomenPlz May 6, 2024

Bageling

When a Jew sees another Jew in public (usually who he doesn't know) and goes over to tell a quick memo. Conversations like these are usually used to tell the other about a time and place for prayers. These will usually occur at any populated public place .(e.g. amusement parks)

Example of Bageling in Context
*At Epcot in Disney World*
*Jewish bystander walking*
*Other Jewish man walking*
*spots jewish bystander, walks over*
Other Jewish Man: "MINCHA BY MEXICO AT 5:30"

by Huds23 May 9, 2016

Bagel in the ass

Whenever you get pulled over and given a ticket.

Person 1: Aw man, I just got given a ticket for goin' 126 miles per hour in a school zone.
Person 2: Oof, that police officer just put a bagel in the ass.

by BigDog823 November 2, 2019

Beach Bagel

A girl that gets a sandy vagina (typically sand that is stuck inside and hard to wash out) after sex on a beach.

I had sex with her the other day on that private beach and she got a beach bagel.

by Zikiro April 1, 2015

Avocado Bagel

If you found this here are some steps

1. Go out and buy a pack of bagels and a couple avocados

2. Get a bagel, cut in half then toast

(While doing step 2 also do step 3)

3. Open a avocado and put it into a bowl then simply. . . SMASH FUCKING REPEATEDLY UNTILL NICE AND FUCKING SOFT

4. Get the bagel out of the toaster and put the smashed avocado on the bagel

5. Eat !

Read my great directions of how to make a very diverse “Avocado Bagel”

by noodleiscool June 22, 2022