Jehovah's Witnesses

A Christian religion often called a cult. They are well known for their frequent missionary visits, wherein they knock on your door, armed with pamphlets and magazines. They should not be confused with Mormon missionaries; a distinct difference is that Jehovah's Witnesses will try to tell you that your religion is wrong using their analytical facts.

JW Missionary: So what religion do you belong to?
Me: I'm a Mormon.
JW Missionary: Well, your Book of Mormon contradicts the Bible!
Me: How so?
JW Missionary: Well, we don't have any of them with us right now...

by Deoxyribose August 4, 2005

Jehovah's Witnesses

If you are in the same room with one you will definately know it! He'll be yelling and screaming, arguing with the Christian who simply wants to take a piss without being tapped on the shoulder and being told that he needs God!

Jehovahs Witness: "You need God!"

Christian: "I need to take a piss and the only things that'll help me with that is my penis and if you will SHUT THE FUCK UP!"

by fuck_me_all_night May 14, 2005

Jehovah's Witness

A person who believes that their only belief is the right belief, tries to inform other people and just ends up frustrating everyone.

Joe was sleeping in his bed at 6 am, then someone knocked at the door. Joe opened the door and to his frustration finds that it's another Jehovah's Witness.

by Jojishi123 December 27, 2011

Jehovahs Witness

A very athletic annoying person

Did you see that Jehovahs Witness run and jump over that fence when my dog started chasing him

SEE: Jehovah's Witless for comparison (they don't make the fence)

by CORNBIOFUEL January 15, 2009

Jehovah's Witnesses

A Christian denomination... have very very very diffrent beliefs then the other denominations have. They are their chruches which are usually called a Kingdom Hall. They tend to knock on doors to get you to join them. You can do either one of three things.

1) Don't answer the door, they'll leave after a minute or leave some of their propaganda litertuare, either that or keep pestering.

2) Answer the door naked or screwing your wife... they'll get freaked out and run away. Or flip the bird.. or aim a shotgun at them. Or sic your dog on them.

3) Let them in and listen to their FUCKING ENDLESS RANT OF DOOM!

Bobby just called... the Jehovah's Witnesses are in the neighboorhood.

by AutisticPsycho November 14, 2004

Jehovah's Witnesses

People who bang on your door at 6:30 in the morning to pass out various religious pamphlets/magazines in an attempt to recruit you into their "religion."
They are like missionaries without the nerdy bicycles, but slightly more irritating.
Don't take their magazines or pamphlets unless you desperately need something to line your birdcage with.

Jehovah's Witnesses> Would you like a copy of the Watchtower??

by SDFojfdo October 27, 2003

Jehovah's Witness

A christian congregation who are extremely devoted to the bible and want to do what Jesus said "Go ye therefore, and teach all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the son, and the Holy Ghost Teaching them to observe all thingswhatsoever I have commanded you: and, lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world." Matthew 28:19-20 (basically Go and mke disciples). If you tell them to go away they will come back because when armageddon comes you can't say no body told me. Just because you've studied the bible doesn't mean you know it. There is alot to learn by doing bible studies with a Witness. :thou believest that there is one God: thou doest well; the devils also believe and tremble" James 2:19 This is a very good scripture for one simple reason believing isn't enough. The devils of this world and past world belives does this mean they will be saved?

A jehovah witness came to my door

by j2k January 1, 2005