Speed Turd

A small speed bump that you don't have to slow down for.

Driver: Speeding, going 55 in a 25.

Passenger: yells slow down, watch out for that speed bump!

Driver: hits it going full speed then says"Oh thats just a speed turd"

by CJ Stuntin March 30, 2010

turd shark

A sexual act where many men and women, sometimes on special occasions even children take shits in a public pool and someone eats as much defication as they can

Clifford: hey Patricia want to get your family together so we can play turd shark?!

Patricia: yeah sounds like fun!

Clifford mmm this shit sure is tasty

Patricias mom Sandy: hey come over here little turd shark I sharted a little bit i here turd shark can smell a shart from miles away

Clifford: oh don't worry Sandy I'll suck that log right out of your fine milf ass!

by Oscar the plug September 5, 2017

Turd Station

1. A place or business where the people are usually rude turds and/or charge outrageous prices for shitty services & products.

2. A radio station or media network, where they put out garbage, such as political spin, political propaganda, dis-information and celebrity news. For example: CNN, NBC, MSNBC, etc.

3. A place where you go to poop.

I was listening to NPR last night, when this guy called in and yelled out, 'What in tarnation is on this turd station'!

by ChemicalPulseDotCom January 15, 2013

Sonic Turd

(Adjective) A piece of music, song or album of such low quality that one's ear-drums have an experience similar to being shit upon, leading to the listener feeling violated, disappointed or filthy for having even been subjected to it.

Coldplay's new album 'Ghost Stories' is a sonic turd of awful proportions.

by Word Smith McGee May 23, 2014

service turd

a waiter, waitress, or other retail worker who has a bad attitude or bad service.

My waitress at Olive Garden last night was a service turd. she took my menu before I had ordered!

by professionalpotato June 7, 2016

shiny turd

When taking someone rough around the edges and making them look and act better, but still has a hint of stank.

Boy oh boy, look at Ryan now. From where he was last year to now? That's one shiny turd!

by Mackb4 March 12, 2017

Turd raft

When you lay down a few sheets of toilet paper on the water surface before taking a dump, preventing water from splashing on your ass when the turd drops.

This toilet looks like it hasn't been cleaned in ages! I better set up a turd raft to protect by delicate bottom from the AIDS.

by mythirdeye006 May 16, 2011