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Jared

stupid fucking asshole that doesnt know what "no" means
that guys such a jared man
by skjssnne February 5, 2020
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Jared

This man one bold ass mf like bro lost his hairs to a cracked out barber bro.
Person1: That guy got a jared.
Person 2: damn wtf, his barber be on that crack head shit!
by Jumping jackin mf November 21, 2021
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Pulling a Jared

When you take too much of a substance you do or don't know the content of and start straight salmon-ing on the floor
Person #1: Yo man I haven't seen Tiffany at school in like 3 days, have you heard from her?
Person #2: Idk man but I heard rumors that she ended up pulling a jared.
by LevMehArone January 25, 2022
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Jared Laing

Jared is a tall man who hit puberty at a young age. He has a huge d**k and the ladies can always see his bulge.
"Look at him you can see it his name must be Jared Laing"
by Jackasswhohatesyouall December 8, 2016
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Jared

A fucking adopted cunt who thinks hes the shit. Beat his ass god damn it
Jared:I'm cool
The boys: Shut up jared your fucking adopted!
by Diabetic surgeon October 15, 2019
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jared zoot

An absolute scary monster of a zoot that only the biggest of zoot smokers can smoke
That's a Jared zoot bro, lemme have some tokes I wanna get Bruce lee'd
by Yea mate August 30, 2017
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Jared

Did you see Jared I heard he has the biggest dick.
by Your dad's mom November 5, 2020
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