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Chatroom Online Midlife Crisis (COMC)  

Someone, middle aged, who changes their blog/chat/screen/etc... names, for no other reason other than, they are suffering Midlife Crisis, offline, which has spilled into their online world. I was studying this, AND, knowing this guy from chatting with him for years, I have determined (and coined a new phrase in doing so,) that dude is suffering from COMC (Chatroom Online Midlife Crisis.)
Just now, I was chatting in the room with someone I have spoken to for about 4-5 years, who is pretty much a f'ing jerk, and someone was asking him why did he change his screen name, again (since he didn't lose it to terms of service violations.) I was studying this, AND, knowing this guy from chatting with him for years, I have determined (and coined a new phrase in doing so,) that dude is suffering from Chatroom Online Midlife Crisis (COMC)
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Midlife Crisis 

Go on and wring my neck
Like when a rag gets wet
A little discipline

For my pet genius

My head is like a lettuce
Go on and dig your thumbs in
I cannot stop giving
I'm thirty-something

Sense of security
Like pockets jingling
Midlife crisis
Suck ingenuity

Down through the family tree
You're perfect, yes, it's true
But without me you're only you
Your menstruating heart
It ain't bleedin' enough for two

It's a midlife crisis
It's a midlife crisis
What an inheritance
The salt and the Kleenex

Morbid self attention
Bending my pinky back

A little discipline
A donor by habit

A little discipline
Rent an opinion
Sense of security
Holding blunt instrument

Midlife crisis
I'm a perfectionist
And perfect is a skinned knee
You're perfect, yes, it's true
But without me you're only you

Your menstruating heart
It ain't bleeding enough for two

(Yeah)

It's a midlife crisis
It's a midlife crisis

You're perfect, yes, it's true (go on and wring my neck)
(Like when a rag gets wet) but without me you're only you (go on and wring my neck)

Your menstruating heart (go on and wring my neck)
(Like when a rag gets wet) it ain't bleedin' enough for two

You're perfect, yes, it's true (go on and wring my neck)
(Like when a rag gets wet) but without me you're only you (go on and wring my neck) (you're only you)
Your menstruating heart (go on and wring my neck)
(Like when a rag gets wet) it ain't bleedin' enough for two
You're perfect, yes, it's true (go on and wring my neck)
(Like when a rag gets wet) but without me you're only you (go on and wring my neck) (you're only you)
Your menstruating heart (go on and wring my neck)
(Like when a rag gets wet) it ain't bleedin' enough for two

You're perfect, yes, it's true (go on and wring my neck)
(Like when a rag gets wet) but without me you're only you (go on and wring my neck)

Your menstruating heart (go on and wring my neck)
(Like when a rag gets wet) it ain't bleedin' enough for two

Midlife Crisis
Midlife Crisis by Death Menace July 21, 2023

Mid-Midlife Crisis 

When a 15-20 buys expensive clothes, alchohol and anything shiny to give their boring life identity.
"Damn, I can't believe Ben's having a mid-midlife crisis at 16!"
Mid-Midlife Crisis by NormalGuy2 October 7, 2022

Midlife Crisink 

Midlife crisis-ink, a tattoo one gets when going through a midlife crisis.
Rod hit 50 and his kids won't talk to him but at least he's got some sweet midlife crisink.

midlifecrisismobile 

Like the penismobile. An expensive sportscar, often a convertible, bought by middle-aged businessmen going through their midlife crises and want to feel young again, completely unaware that they look like morons.
Never drive a convertible if you are graying or balding, or it is automatically a midlifecrisismobile.