if god exists then i will go to heaven

What every semi-believer claims is their rationale for believing in religion.

I am Catholic because if God exists then I will go to heaven.

by Bad C dev October 13, 2021

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What in God's green African jungles??

Another way of asking the infamous question, "what on earth?" while recognizing the almighty God's diverse and most eccentric creation, Africa/Africans.

*arrives home early from vacation and find doors off hinges, roughed-up walls, and a trusted friend wearing my clothes.*

"What in God's green African jungles?? ... ???" =:O

"Er, I can explain..."

"Please do."

by 0.O September 11, 2013

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only god can judge me

A phrase typically sported by swag fags, gangbangers, wannabe gangbangers, wiggers, drug addicts and the like in order to justify or enable their shitty habits or behaviors. This phrase is often uttered most by those who would be the last person you would think of when thinking of a disciple of God. The moral equivalent of starting a fight then saying, "You wouldn't hit someone with glasses, would you?"

"Hey, John. You should really stop sleeping with 15 year olds and using your Moms money on tattoos of your birth year."
"Stfu, nigga. Only God can judge me."

by BigRed527 December 10, 2014

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