Douche Canoe (noun): A self-absorbed, obnoxious individual who drifts through life on a raft of arrogance, bad takes, and an utter lack of self-awareness. Often mistaken for a human, but upon closer inspection, closely resembles a sentient, poorly groomed toe with an attitude problem because he likely sat on a pinecone.
Example: Kyle, the human embodiment of a stubbed toe, leaned back in his chair, manspreading like he was claiming land, and loudly explaining why everyone else was wrong about literally everything. Between flexing his "elite genetics" (despite looking like a swollen big toe) and hitting on anything that moved, he remained blissfully unaware that the entire room was desperately hoping for a strong gust of wind to carry his douche canoe far, far away.
by Sassenach March 14, 2025
Get the Douche Canoemug. by Deodexidus October 12, 2013
Get the Douchemug. A guy who willingly ends friendships for his girlfriend, then begs for forgiveness after they break up.
by Minus5885 September 21, 2015
Get the runaway douchemug. Very similar to a Cheeky Dick Waffle, but leaning more toward 'douche bag' or 'needs to be punched in the throat' than 'clever'.
Westborough Baptist Church supporter: "Well, I think those children needed to die. It's a SIGN FROM G-
Random guy in the back of room: Oh, shut your whore mouth, you snazzy douche muffin. No one asked for your opinion.
Random guy in the back of room: Oh, shut your whore mouth, you snazzy douche muffin. No one asked for your opinion.
by Leyulf September 30, 2013
Get the Snazzy Douche Muffinmug. A typical willies douche is someone who works at willies and does not correlate with anyone else but the willies cult.
by Qwertymanguy December 1, 2022
Get the typical Willies douchemug. A person who shuns the use of sleeves and regards bottle openers as a poor substitute for slamming beers bottles on kitchen tables
It's 20 below and Zach still refuses to sew those sleeves back on his sweatshirt...what a douche bag
by Rytoc December 7, 2007
Get the douche bagmug. Taken from a lyric of Manfred Mann's "Blinded By The Light". A revved up douche is a douche of a person who is 'revved up', i.e., acting particularly douchey; someone being extra rude, loud, over the top, etc.
To be revved up like a douche is to be someone exhibiting behaviors like that of a douche that is revved up.
To be revved up like a douche is to be someone exhibiting behaviors like that of a douche that is revved up.
"Did you see that revved up douche in the crowd?"
See also:
"Man, Jack was really revved up like a douche today"
See also:
"Man, Jack was really revved up like a douche today"
by KillerNugget April 5, 2024
Get the Revved up douchemug.