"You can stroll a store's aisles till Doomsday and never spot da item you want, but then, just as soon as you interrupt a staffperson to ask for help in locating said desirable, THAT'S when you will notice your sought-after item right off!"
While stocking up on food at a Super Walmart, I was looking for larger packages of Armour Vienna sausage so that I could save a few cents per can, but although I had thoroughly searched the surrounding areas on the shelves, I still hadn't found anything bigger than the small six-packs, so I finally asked a nearby employee if there were any of the larger packages in stock, possibly in the back room. Well, just as we were both walking back to the area of the aisle where I'd been looking, THAT'S when I finally spied the 12-packs that were sitting on the very top shelf! Guess that was a classic case of Murphy's Law of Customer-Assistance... ah, well, again, the 12-packs were indeed sitting very high up, so at least that was a plausible excuse for my not having seen them before, especially since the store usually doesn't even expect its customers to notice stuff that's placed 'way up there, anyway; that "lofty" location is merely where they store extra merchandise for replenishing the lower-down shelves when the stock there starts to run low.
by QuacksO May 14, 2019
Get the Murphy's Law of Customer-Assistance mug.Otherwise known as a TA, a comical and tardy individual who’s consistently only productive on Thursdays.
by Pavss June 8, 2018
Get the Cardiovascular Assistant I mug."Today I helped Elliot get this girl he was after."
"You mean that simp? So you're basically his Assistant Simp?"
"You mean that simp? So you're basically his Assistant Simp?"
by Sh0rtkakke March 25, 2020
Get the Assistant Simp mug.An observer and/or participant in an intercourse session --- often the "second" guy/girl in a threesome --- who is tasked with promptly tucking the dude's randomly-swaying woodie back into the chick's love-tunnel whenever it accidentally pops out from his having unintentionally withdrawn it a bit too far prior to his next thrust; this relieves the lovers from irritating pauses in their steamy copulating to semi-blindly fumble back there themselves and re-insert the errant schlong each time.
Finding a willing re-insertion assistant is usually quite easy --- often, you simply need to approach a random passerby and offer him/her a "standard" reward for his/her help: agree to allow the person "a turn of his/her own" with the opposite-gender intercourse-partner afterwards (or at least a post-session hand-job/blowjob from the gal if it's a male assistant), let the person play with the balls and butt-cheeks of the copulating duo for a few moments after each occasion during the "hot 'n' heavy" when his services are required, and/or maybe allow him to give one or both partners a full-body massage --- extra points if you both also give him a nice soothing rub-down in return, of course --- after the session is over.
by QuacksO June 17, 2018
Get the re-insertion assistant mug.by AntiLightskin September 16, 2025
Get the Assisted Patriotism mug.Unable to hook your bra unaided following an intense upper body workout, requiring assistance until range of motion is improved
by fitnut May 16, 2014
Get the assisted bra hook mug.A person employed by a shopping complex who (according to management) only walk around the centre doing nothing else but talking to retailers, walking around in pairs and moaning about the higher management because they want their staff to become uniform and robotic. They are often unkempt with manly beards and/or eccentric hair styles.
There goes that duty assistant talking to the ice cream stand staff again, he/she has been for 20 seconds and that's far too long. Why are we employing these people?
by Subarashí March 1, 2015
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