Wampire

A cross between an Umpire and a Vampire. They pose little threat to the human race as their only power is calling a baseball game down the middle and they are only able to come out at night.

-Holy shit! Is that a Vampire?

--No dude! I think it's an umpire!

---You guys are dumbasses. It's nothing but a harmless wampire.

by Nacho Supreme September 28, 2008

wampire

A mythical creature related to vampires in name only, wampires are born of tragedy and cry tears of blood as they prepare to feed on human flesh. Some can take on human form and a select few can turn into other earthly creatures as well, their favorite form being that of the spider.

Abby: That spider looks weird. Are those drops of blood on its face?

Jim: That's no spider; that's a wampire. Run!

by nicorette_m2f July 7, 2008