Business Class Asylum Seeker (n.)
A tax-bracket Olympian who earns six figures before breakfast but somehow qualifies for every grant, rebate, and relief scheme under the sun. Typically found complaining about “lazy people on benefits” while submitting their fifth R&D tax claim for an app that doesn’t work.
Master of the limited company shuffle, they employ themselves, invoice themselves, and occasionally furlough themselves — all while driving a Tesla bought through the business. They view the welfare state not as a safety net, but as a rewards program for the financially literate.
A tax-bracket Olympian who earns six figures before breakfast but somehow qualifies for every grant, rebate, and relief scheme under the sun. Typically found complaining about “lazy people on benefits” while submitting their fifth R&D tax claim for an app that doesn’t work.
Master of the limited company shuffle, they employ themselves, invoice themselves, and occasionally furlough themselves — all while driving a Tesla bought through the business. They view the welfare state not as a safety net, but as a rewards program for the financially literate.
“Have you seen your sisters LinkedIn? Bragging about scaling her company and ‘creating opportunities’ — she’s the biggest business class asylum seeker I know. Claimed three COVID grants while leasing a Q5.”
by Hellohew July 18, 2025
Get the Business class asylum seekermug. (noun)
The civilized part of an airplane where you sip sparkling wine at 35,000 feet and convince yourself you’ve “earned this” because you answered two emails last week. Nobody should know that you've ended up here because of a free upgrade to due capacity reasons. And dont forget that this is the part of the plane where flight attendants pretend to care more just because you might have paid their monthly income for just the one-way ticket.
Description:
A sanctuary of legroom and linen napkins, Business Class is where the Wi-Fi is faster, the air smells faintly of ambition, and the seat reclines further than most people’s life goals. It’s not just travel — it’s performance relaxation.
Population:
• Entrepreneurs who say “I don’t fly coach — not for vibrational reasons.”
• Tech bros typing on laptops that haven’t been turned on since boarding.
• People who post a photo of champagne with the caption “Grind never stops.” (yep, the ones who got that upgrade for free)
Side Effects:
• Using “jet lag” as an identity.
• Forgetting that the curtain behind you conceals the rest of humanity.
• Spontaneous urge to say “I’ll circle back” mid–glass of Chardonnay.
The civilized part of an airplane where you sip sparkling wine at 35,000 feet and convince yourself you’ve “earned this” because you answered two emails last week. Nobody should know that you've ended up here because of a free upgrade to due capacity reasons. And dont forget that this is the part of the plane where flight attendants pretend to care more just because you might have paid their monthly income for just the one-way ticket.
Description:
A sanctuary of legroom and linen napkins, Business Class is where the Wi-Fi is faster, the air smells faintly of ambition, and the seat reclines further than most people’s life goals. It’s not just travel — it’s performance relaxation.
Population:
• Entrepreneurs who say “I don’t fly coach — not for vibrational reasons.”
• Tech bros typing on laptops that haven’t been turned on since boarding.
• People who post a photo of champagne with the caption “Grind never stops.” (yep, the ones who got that upgrade for free)
Side Effects:
• Using “jet lag” as an identity.
• Forgetting that the curtain behind you conceals the rest of humanity.
• Spontaneous urge to say “I’ll circle back” mid–glass of Chardonnay.
Ever since Brad flew Business Class once, he’s been calling the flight attendants ‘crew’ and complaining about turbulence like it’s a customer service issue.
by coral-coalson October 27, 2025
Get the Business Classmug. YEAH MATE, ME 'N THE MISSUS SPLURGED THE EXTRA FIFTY BUCKS FOR BOGAN BUSINESS CLASS ON OUR JETSTAR FLIGHTS TO BALI NEXT WEEK
by Zerogravitas June 8, 2024
Get the Bogan business classmug.