Skip to main content

New Jersey - Part 5

Here's Part 5 of my 5178 character essay on how amazing NJ is. Go to my profile for previous. And you know what we made? CAMPBELLS'. FUCKING. SOUP. CAMPBELLS IS ARGUABLY THE BEST SOUP COMPANY IN THE ENTIRE NATION AND YOU KNOW THAT. We also have Wawas but I'm not sure if they're actually FROM NJ they might be a Pennsylvania or Connecticut thing. I'll go look it up. Yeah they're from PA but still we have a lot of wawas while you californians don't. And yes, we're the most dense. We're also in the top half of populous states (I think). If you live here you can go out to New York with your friends for your occasional good time. (However, the traffic on the turnpike can get big. Also always remember to take the HOLLAND tunnel. Lincoln tunnel sucks and it's irrelevant.) Despite having to pay a ridiculous toll fee, it's worth it. We've got one of the most dense cities in the US (Jersey City). Go to my profile for the last part part 6 it's up because i posted them all in the same 10 mins (i wrote the entire essay at once but then realized i couldn't post it so broke it up into parts after)
that's the end of New Jersey - Part 5
by Stroughbries2763 September 3, 2022
mugGet the New Jersey - Part 5 mug.

New Jersey - Part 6

Last part, part 6 of how amazing NJ is which I can't put all in 1 part because of the character limit.I feel like you're about to say "Oh this guy talks so much about jersey" Yes. I talk about Jersey. I FUCKING LOVE JERSEY. IT'S MY STATE. Our state motto would be "Unwarranted Confidence, Unlimited Attitude." WE LOVE OUR STATE. WE ARE PROUD LITTLE MOTHERFUCKERS AND WE WILL STAY LIKE THAT. Also yes we have very amazing school system, better than something like Alabama's or Idaho's, we keep our state not smelly (granted, part of the GS parkway can get smelly but that space takes up like 5% of the state, which is not much.) Also yes Toyota is pretty much the only car you see. We have a very high Asian Population (That includes countries that aren't china btw) and we probably have at least 90% of all the emo kids in the country.
I have a lot more to say about our amazing state but I'm getting tired of typing and I've spent like almost an hour on this shit, so bye bitches i might make a continuation with parts 7-12 sometime if I get really bored but don't expect me to.
That's the end of New Jersey - Part 6 (and the end of this huge ass thing)
by Stroughbries2763 September 3, 2022
mugGet the New Jersey - Part 6 mug.

Jersey Shore Rule

In reference to the rule the Jersey Shote cast came up with when Mike hit on a “tranny”

“If you have to ask, if there is even a question, assume it’s a guy”
“Damn that girl is hot I’m gonna go talk to her”

I don’t know, I mean look at her hands and that Adam’s apple. Might be trans and if you’re into that go ahead but if not remember the Jersey Shore Rule”
by Jumbalaya Eater April 27, 2022
mugGet the Jersey Shore Rule mug.

Jersey Dirty Devil

Similar to a pig on a spit roast, a person holds on to a spinning horizontal stick and a person standing behind them sticks their finger in the ass of the person while they spin. Optional oral sex if you are brave enough.
A: Asked what her favorite position was, and she said Jersey Dirty Devil!
B: Oh shit! I’ve been trying to get my girl to do it, we only do glory holes.
by They Sold Seeds May 1, 2022
mugGet the Jersey Dirty Devil mug.

Come now jersey cow

A very common saying that means to hurry along a beautiful woman. Preferably to a bedroom
Come now jersey cow, the man said to his intended lover.
mugGet the Come now jersey cow mug.

New Jersey

The most disgusting place in America.

Literally the armpit of this great nation; if the nation had heinous curry fueled armpit B.O. If you role down your window as you pass by the “Welcome to New Jersey” sign, you are smacked in the face with a putrid smell of New York’s garbage that Jersey removes for them. The worst drivers in the country; they drive like maniacs… probably because they are trying to escape the trash-boat state they were unfortunate enough to be born into.
Dan: “Hey Steve roll down the window I wanna smell that fresh New Jersey air”
Steve: “If you roll that window down I will fucking strike you in the liver… New Jersey smells like your Aunt Claudia’s vagine, Dan… worst state in the Union
by Bdflyfish May 9, 2022
mugGet the New Jersey mug.

Cast of the jersey shore

Have you seen the cast of the Jersey Shore?
Yeah bro, they're spastics
And Goofy Ah too!
by BADUSSYCLUSSYPUSSYSLAYER69 October 26, 2022
mugGet the Cast of the jersey shore mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email