by mikelito24 June 17, 2012
Get the Real Beans mug.Commonly used in the year 1296 by the roman empire
Any plebeian that did not pay the required monthly quapples (RMQ) was to be dragged into the center of town by the lowest ranked cobblers son(s) to be stripped of all clothing followed by a communal cobbling. After 8 moon phases have passed the plebian's are clarted to the bean pit where they are blind folded as well as lubricated to ensure maximum solubility in lubement. After this the pit seal is crafted from hay and Steel as well as procured plebian meat nuggets from past bean baths. The seal then covers the bean pit and is tightened and secured by a rapid stomping ritual performed by the eldest women of the village. By the time the pit has fully hardened the rays of the sun will have heated the pit to 78.3 degrees kelvin. This causes the Plebian's previous physical form to reduce to a meat slush. The immense heat and pressure causes the slush to ooze out of all the cracks and crevices of the seal. After several minutes all of the slush will desnify and evaporate creating a impenetrable barrier that encapsulates the plebian's soul for 7 maridiun quadralights.
This Form of torture was made a war crime in the following year due to its cruel, unusual, and inhuman methods.
Any plebeian that did not pay the required monthly quapples (RMQ) was to be dragged into the center of town by the lowest ranked cobblers son(s) to be stripped of all clothing followed by a communal cobbling. After 8 moon phases have passed the plebian's are clarted to the bean pit where they are blind folded as well as lubricated to ensure maximum solubility in lubement. After this the pit seal is crafted from hay and Steel as well as procured plebian meat nuggets from past bean baths. The seal then covers the bean pit and is tightened and secured by a rapid stomping ritual performed by the eldest women of the village. By the time the pit has fully hardened the rays of the sun will have heated the pit to 78.3 degrees kelvin. This causes the Plebian's previous physical form to reduce to a meat slush. The immense heat and pressure causes the slush to ooze out of all the cracks and crevices of the seal. After several minutes all of the slush will desnify and evaporate creating a impenetrable barrier that encapsulates the plebian's soul for 7 maridiun quadralights.
This Form of torture was made a war crime in the following year due to its cruel, unusual, and inhuman methods.
(Modern example)
"Hey tom you wanna see the football game with me tonight?"
"Sorry Jim I can't I promised my girlfriend i'd give her a bean bath tonight."
"Hey tom you wanna see the football game with me tonight?"
"Sorry Jim I can't I promised my girlfriend i'd give her a bean bath tonight."
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