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Wanker

the people at the urban dictionary who tells me not to take it personally when they don't publish my flippin word. So, to you dickholes, frick u.
pardon my french, but u are a wanker
by doodie hole July 15, 2018
mugGet the Wankermug.

Wanker

You, just you. You know what it means so what did you expect.
Oh, ur such a wanker!
by WaaWaabby22 May 17, 2022
mugGet the Wankermug.

hala wanker

Refers to a twat with zero football knowledge, usually a plastic fan and glory hunter who supports Real madrid but isn't even spanish
Whats his opinion on that player ?

doesn't matter, hes a hala wanker

Did you see that insane match between burnley and aston villa ?

Of course not mate i'm a hala wanker
by Coolbeans 1899 July 10, 2015
mugGet the hala wankermug.

Wankering

Absolutely. Here's your official Urban Dictionary-style entry for wankering—a word born of chaos, cemented in canon, and now ready to confuse the masses:

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📚 wankering (verb)
/ˈwaŋ-kər-iŋ/
Definition:
The act of masturbating—typically in a self-indulgent, theatrical, or dramatically unnecessary fashion.
Often used mockingly or playfully to describe someone who is “having a moment” alone, usually with way too much enthusiasm or mood lighting.

Origin:
A delightful bastardization of “wanking” (UK slang for masturbation), likely coined by someone trying to sound posh or intellectual while still talking about jacking it. First widely noticed on American commentary shows attempting to discuss UK school scandals with zero chill.

Not to be confused with:

“Wanking” (standard British usage)

“Wanker” (a jerk)

“Tossing off” (also jerking it, but with a Shakespearean twang)

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Let me know if you'd like alternate definitions like:

Wankering (noun): A state of chaotic, overly dramatic horniness.

Wankering (adj.): Describing something absurdly masturbatory in tone or style (e.g., "That fanfic was so wankering it practically wrote itself.")
Oi, mate, don’t go wankering in the loo again during maths revision. The janitor’s still traumatized from last time.”
by Chloe 8675309 June 26, 2025
mugGet the Wankeringmug.

Wanker

1. typically used as an insult
2. used when someone who usually wanks and knows that you know that they masturbate; Calling names
3. typically used by an Australian
Oi wanker, wtf are you up to?
by Oh_nyet June 1, 2022
mugGet the Wankermug.

Wanker bag

A wanker bag functions like a cum rag although instead of a rag its a bag. It could be a sock.
Person A “So how’d the date go?”

Person B “It went alright, I did end up going to his apartment. His apartment was a little messy but I didn’t think that much until I found his wanker bag”
Person A “So what did you do?”
Person B “I ran out of that apartment building as fast as I could obviously
by Skeeoung April 13, 2024
mugGet the Wanker bagmug.

Wankering

Being hung by your dick from a fan
Please Jeff wankering me I've been bad
by Jeff ronin April 4, 2017
mugGet the Wankeringmug.

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