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esc f1 f2 f3 f4 f5 f6 f7 d8 f9 f10 f11 f12 power `1234567890-= delete tab qwertyuiop[]\ caps lock asdfghjkl;' return lshift zxcvbnm,./ rshift fn control option command space command option arrows 

(looks down at keyboard and sees esc f1 f2 f3 f4 f5 f6 f7 d8 f9 f10 f11 f12 power `1234567890-= delete tab qwertyuiop\ caps lock asdfghjkl;' return lshift zxcvbnm,./ rshift fn control option command space command option arrows)
esc f1 f2 f3 f4 f5 f6 f7 d8 f9 f10 f11 f12 power `1234567890-= delete tab qwertyuiop[]\ caps lock asdfghjkl;' return lshift zxcvbnm,./ rshift fn control option command space command option arrows mug front
Get the esc f1 f2 f3 f4 f5 f6 f7 d8 f9 f10 f11 f12 power `1234567890-= delete tab qwertyuiop[]\ caps lock asdfghjkl;' return lshift zxcvbnm,./ rshift fn control option command space command option arrows mug.
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Deleted snap 

An undeserved response to someone who responded with “yessir”
Girl: “Deleted snap?? why did you delete your response to my text

*her text*: “yessirr”

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Long Story Deleted

Contemporary version of Long Story Short. Typically seen as LSD in electronic media (twitter, Reddit, facebook, text messages, emails, etc). Most often used when the outcome of a story is predictable.
My cousin set me up on a blind date. Long Story Deleted, she has been disinherited.