211 definitions by von groovy

at least i'm not

The phrase people use when feeling bad about their life when ompared to their friend who is recognized as the loser of the crew.

Angie was really upset over her life and then said at least I'm not Cheryl...

by von groovy June 9, 2019

Oral Massage

The act of being lied to by another which produces a positive sensation despite the person knowing it is a lie.

Although Kenny knew that Alisha had "Frenched" his best friend last night, her oral massage which consisted of her doing it in order to be a better kisser for him made him feel good.

by von groovy May 17, 2017

the environment

Something Trump doesn't give a fuck about. Now, money and power are another story.

I was living the other day in the environment just like all humans do and realized that the U.S. President doesn't give a fuck about it.

by von groovy June 3, 2017

disasterqueef

A queef that occurs during sex that is so severe it kills the boner and may induce impotence

Larry: Did you hear about Gabe?
Jason: Nope
Larry: Him and Becky were getting in good when she let out a disasterqueef!!
Jason: Man, fuck that!
Larry: Gabe can only get wood now by going to the forest.

by von groovy May 4, 2019

public transportation patience

This is the tremendously flexible patience you have to use to deal with the sorts of weirdos and headaches you encounter on public transportation

After the homeless woman shit on the seat next to her and the subway lights went off, Lisa had to use a serious amount of public transportation patience to get through every second.

by von groovy April 13, 2019

Get your nopes up

Something to tell a friend when they foolishly have their hopes up and it just ain't gonna happen.

Bart: "I'm gonna ask Trixie to the prom! We'll get a limo and stay at the Four Seasons! I'll get my weenie wet in all the right ways!"
Archie: "Slow down, B-man! Trixie is going with the Ad-man! You'd better get your nopes up and back to your garbage reality."

by von groovy August 25, 2018

dreamshame

The unpleasant feeling you have after having a dream where you do something you really want to do, but can't in your waking life due to the shame you'd feel

Seamus was walking around the block today in full dreamshame mode after having that dream where he boned his teacher Mrs. Jones.

by von groovy April 13, 2019