paul ward's definitions

New Zealand

A naturally blessed country in the south seas next to Australia. There are some Australians who think NZ's not worth a pinch of shit, and lay lots of it on NZ because they don't know any better. I hope there are only a minority of Australians who feel like this, as in all honesty NZ is pretty damn awesome. Also, many Kiwis tend to hate Australia because they think Australians dislike NZ. Hopefully it isn't too widespread.

Aussie 1: New Zealand's not worth a pinch of shit!

Aussie 2: Oath

Aussie 1: No there's lots of Aussies who think that.

by Paul Ward December 14, 2006

australia

A country that loves New Zealand. Seriously. As opposed to this idea that many Aussies hate New Zealand well let's just say that a couple of years ago a certain young woman went to Bali for a holiday and what a fine time she's having too. (*not*) Leave it at that shall we? Obviously the inverse doesn't apply if the two nations are co-operating with each other in Solomons Tonga, Timor.. And two seperate countries they will remain. A majority of people in either nation weren't too keen on the idea in 1901 and aren't now. So if that lass with the sheep up her arse could try and realise that things would be good.

Underneath the squabbling Australia and New Zealand really do love each other.

by Paul Ward November 22, 2006

New Zealand

No one on here is saying Australians are gay, the fact is some Australians (and people in every other country) are arseholes. New Zealand was actually a colony of Britain not Australia, but with Australia as the big brother it administered New Zealand for a bit. And no it was not a Fourth of July style breakaway. Come Waitangi, New Zealand became a seperate colony. That happened in 1840. And while the two nations are a lot like each other, there are a number of subtle differences, however, this should not stop them from getting on.

Oz and New Zealand will never stop taking the piss out of each other, but when required, the two of them can knuckle down and get on with each other. That is why both of them are so effective as individual nations.

by Paul Ward May 10, 2007

Australia

A beautiful land that doesn't masquerade as a Commonwealth country it is one. There are pockets of racism, xenophobia and whatnot, but there a lot of positives and these should be celebrated. I know someone from there who thought it was crap and then he spent a year in Europe well actually the main purpose of his trip was to be an airport bum checking out the airports over there, and let's just say he didn't think so after that.

Australia rocks. It's airports rock too.

by Paul Ward October 24, 2006

Australia

A mostly great and beautiful land of generally intelligent people who are not racist. As has already been stated, Australians have a friendly rivalry going with New Zealand. However, despite the sheep jokes the "fish and chips" bit there is a fondness for New Zealand behind it all. Despite Australia's image being "tarnished" recently, Australia will be able to hold her head high when little Johnny retires. The problem is, however, there is no alternative government to vote for.

Despite sentiments to the contrary, Australian society as a whole is not that racist. Hell, there are so many cultures living in Australia aren't there, you are bound to have a few tensions from time to time. I think it is important that people realise only a minority of Australians are racist thugs. The rest, are great people.

Australia is not perfect but then, where is?

by Paul Ward July 22, 2006

Insomnia

A condition where a person cannot find sleep, and therefore life enjoyment goes out the window. I consider myself a chronic insomniac and have been this way for the past month and so I do not know when I will ever have a good night's sleep again.

I wish this insomnia would end and I can slip off into dreamland as opposed to slitting my wrists.

by Paul Ward March 30, 2007

Steve Irwin

You people might want to do something about the chips on your shoulders. Good grief only neanderthals assume that because a person of a certain nationality talks in a certain way or does something to a certain animal then everyone else does it. Steve Irwin has just died numbnuts. He was a bloody legend in every sense of the word, who had a great passion for his promotion of the Australian environment and wildlife. I was shocked to read of his death this afternoon so will you flaming chip-on-the-shoulder ridden clowns do something good for yourselves and knock them off?

RIP Steve

Steve Irwin wasn't perfect but he did have a bloody heart of gold.

by Paul Ward September 4, 2006