Definitions by jims gooning
Toilet After Your Dad Used It
A biohazard toxic to all life on Earth as we know it - yes, even more lethal than the atmosphere of Venus or the Chernobyl Exclusion Zone... combined. Any human being unfortunate enough to breathe in the stench of this toxic environment will immediately fry the inside of their lungs causing irreversible, instantaneous damage. The entire olfactory system will shut down and implode on itself, and causing death within seconds. Even if one tries to wear a gas mask, hazmat suit, space suit or other form of protection, it will disintegrate within seconds from the sheer amount of toxic gasses.
The toilet after someone's dad uses it, is a HIGHLY dangerous environment, don't bother going ANYWHERE near it unless you have a death wish... (or you're one of those weird DeviantArt type dwellers who is immune to the adverse reactions from farts).
The toilet after someone's dad uses it, is a HIGHLY dangerous environment, don't bother going ANYWHERE near it unless you have a death wish... (or you're one of those weird DeviantArt type dwellers who is immune to the adverse reactions from farts).
Jim: Name one extreme sport on earth more dangerous and dumber than cave diving, I bet you can't-
Steve: Going into the Toilet After Your Dad Used It.
Jim: Touché.
Someones Dad after eating too much Taco Bell: This bathroom needs a hero!
Steve: Going into the Toilet After Your Dad Used It.
Jim: Touché.
Someones Dad after eating too much Taco Bell: This bathroom needs a hero!
Toilet After Your Dad Used It by jims gooning August 29, 2026
Toowoomba Pasta
Toowoomba Pasta by jims gooning August 1, 2025
Chocolate Thunder From Down Under
When a bogan tourist gets travelers diarrhea and shits everywhere, and it's explosive and nasty as fuck.
I've heard the Chocolate Thunder from Down Under gets so bad in Bali the janitors have to call in the hazmat team.
Chocolate Thunder From Down Under by jims gooning August 1, 2025
No Hat No Play
Gospel in many Aussie primary schools. Possibly because the rate of skin cancer is so high in Straya. You can essentially do whatever you want in the playground as long as you're wearing your hat, the teachers won't mind.
Seriously, you can literally bully someone so much they go on to develop depression and 97 other mental illnesses (trust me i know), or you could shit a mountain on top of the handball court with your mates, go ham and the teachers won't give a fuck what you're doing - as long as you've got your hats on! Because, no hat no play!
Seriously, you can literally bully someone so much they go on to develop depression and 97 other mental illnesses (trust me i know), or you could shit a mountain on top of the handball court with your mates, go ham and the teachers won't give a fuck what you're doing - as long as you've got your hats on! Because, no hat no play!
Teachers when someone is being beaten up by eshays: i sleep
Teachers when someone projectile shits all over the walls of a classroom, turning the place into a Jackson Pollock artwork: i sleep
Teachers when some dipshit releases a jar of giant sydney funnel webs into the playground: i sleep
Teachers when someone forgets their hat: UNACCEPTABLE!!! No hat no play!
Teachers when someone projectile shits all over the walls of a classroom, turning the place into a Jackson Pollock artwork: i sleep
Teachers when some dipshit releases a jar of giant sydney funnel webs into the playground: i sleep
Teachers when someone forgets their hat: UNACCEPTABLE!!! No hat no play!
No Hat No Play by jims gooning May 24, 2025
Trumpet of Patriots
When a bunch of old men between ages 65-95 get together, eat a bunch of beans and then proceed to stand in a circle, jack each other off while continuously farting and jizz into one big collective puddle while singing the national anthem.
Bruce: My neighbour is an extremely homophobic priest but last night I saw on the news he got caught in the middle of a Trumpet of Patriots with his dick out
Ned: At least hes not a rock spider like all the other priests lol!!!
Ned: At least hes not a rock spider like all the other priests lol!!!
Trumpet of Patriots by jims gooning May 13, 2025
Doorstep Crapper
A "doorstep crapper" (or pooper) is a person who does something and then denies it, despite the strong evidence they did indeed.
Comes from the analogy of someone pooping on a doorstep, and upon confrontation says "Nobody's pooping on your doorstep, stop overreacting." Before again pooping on the doorstep later.
Doorstep crappers are hypocritical and act like they are innocent despite being guilty liars.
Comes from the analogy of someone pooping on a doorstep, and upon confrontation says "Nobody's pooping on your doorstep, stop overreacting." Before again pooping on the doorstep later.
Doorstep crappers are hypocritical and act like they are innocent despite being guilty liars.
Example 1:
Person: Hey, Bob, stop stealing my cookies.
Bob: Nobody's stealing your cookies, stop complaining, nobody cares. *proceeds to steal Person's cookies*
Person: I see you Bob, stop being a doorstep crapper.
Example 2:
Kid: Hey, stop copying my work!
Peer: I'm not copying your work! *blatantly copies Kid's work again*
Person: Hey, Bob, stop stealing my cookies.
Bob: Nobody's stealing your cookies, stop complaining, nobody cares. *proceeds to steal Person's cookies*
Person: I see you Bob, stop being a doorstep crapper.
Example 2:
Kid: Hey, stop copying my work!
Peer: I'm not copying your work! *blatantly copies Kid's work again*
Doorstep Crapper by jims gooning May 1, 2021