Definitions by gorpoglorp

Techsplaining 

When a user in an online tech support forum, especially on reddit, responds to a specific technical question with unsolicited hardware/software advice, personal endorsements of unrelated technology, unrelated tangents, or put-downs about the asker's use of technology or level of technical ability. Portmanteau of "technology" and "mansplaining".

User 1: "I have a Windows 7 PC that keeps freezing every time I start a certain program. Can anyone help me figure out why it's doing this?"
User 2: "Bro wtf, why are you still using Windows 7? Are you a complete moron? Just upgrade to Windows 11 already. It's so much better. If your computer still runs Windows 7, you're living in the fucking dark ages. Get a laptop with a Ryzen CPU and at least 32GB of RAM. It's better for gaming and really worth the price."
User 1: "Thank you for techsplaining. Are you going to answer my question or not?"

Techsplaining by gorpoglorp May 13, 2022

Tampanian Whisper 

A phenomenon unique to Tampa, FL arising from social situations where strangers aren't sure whether to address each other with southern town-like hospitality or northern city-like aloofness, resulting in one or more strangers hesitantly whispering, mumbling, or even just mouthing pleasantries to each other while making minimal to no eye contact. Also a form of anomie.

Tampanian 1: "..."
Tampanian 2: "Hmphmph..."
Tampanian 1: "Nnn..."
Non-Tampanian: "What was that all about?"
Tampanian 3: "That, my friend, was the Tampanian Whisper."

Tampanian Whisper by gorpoglorp February 3, 2022

dyshorologia 

Like dyslexia or dyscalculia, but only for reading analog (old style) clock faces. You can do math no problem, but clock faces are like trying to decipher an ancient code.

John: "Hey, what time is it?"
Greg: -stares intently at clock on the wall-
John: "... you okay over there?"
Greg: "I think I have dyshorologia."

dyshorologia by gorpoglorp January 24, 2022