Definitions by Walter Perkiss

Anti-Samite

Someone who only listens to Roth-era Van Halen and rejects the Sammy Hagar years.

I’m a longtime anti-Samite — those Van Hagar albums suck donkey dick.

Delaying a household task because you need to take a shit (go number two).

“I don’t have time to mow the fucking lawn right now — I have to plead the second.”