Uncle Funkalunkel's definitions

Vart

A queef or quiff, as it is sometimes spelled. It is an expulsion of air made when some dude is punding his meat into some bitch's sloppy puss-hole. Stems from Vagina fART. The experience itself is not terrible, but the word 'vart' is.

When I was fucking your mom, she jumped off my cock and varted in your girlfriend's mouth before your girlfriend started munching her box.

by Uncle Funkalunkel September 29, 2003

vaginal blood fart

A menstrual ejection. When a woman is menstruating, and she queefs a blood clot.

I was giving your mom a donkey punch when she popped a vaginal blood fart.

by Uncle Funkalunkel October 10, 2003

ass clitoris

A nub of flesh on the top of someone's asshole. Pretty fucking gross.

I was fucking your mom in the ass and I tapped her ass clitoris and she squirted diarrhea on me.

by Uncle Funkalunkel October 29, 2003

Assing it up

The act of going over to someone's house and dropping some serious deuces. Can also be when you go to someone's house and rip a couple.

Damn, Mark is having a party. I'm gonna go to his house and ass it up in that motherfucker.

by Uncle Funkalunkel October 15, 2003

cock-tease

An idiot. A girl who makes a guy achieve bonerdom, but will not participate in any jizz-inducing behavior. This is a dangerous game, and many cock-teases wind up with a bloody nose and a face full of spooge.

Cock-teases are almost as terrible as Republicans.

by Uncle Funkalunkel October 10, 2003

Crucified Alien

The name of some sucka MC named Alex. Very chill guy, extremely smart and willing to learn, and a hell of a lay. Give him some Twizzlers and he's yours for life.

Crucified Alien stole the cookie from the cookie jar.
Who, me?
Yes, you!
Couldn't be!
Then, who?

by Uncle Funkalunkel November 14, 2003

Puta Esquerosa

Spanish, meaning 'Filthy Whore'. Usually a disgusting, vile woman. The 'es' in esquerosa is usually silent.

Tu mama es una puta esquerosa.

by Uncle Funkalunkel October 9, 2003