An Italian plumber from the mushroom kingdom. He is rarely seen doing his job as a plumber because he is to busy eating magical mushrooms and trying to get laid. His arch-enemy is The Koopa King, named Bowser. Mario has a younger brother named Luigi. Mario's parents never gave a shit about him (letting him ride on a retarded green dinosaur and letting him drive a go-cart all at a very young age).
8 year-old 1: Let's go play Mario!!!
8 year-old 2: I can't, My mom says that the game has to much drug abuse.