Shower Handle's definitions

Simi Valley

A very very boring city. Once was one of the safest cities in America but now is nowhere even close. A city filled with tweakers and a major Heroine epidemic. All of the high schools are filled with snotty white kids and wannabe thug “skater kids” who are addicted to their juul, and can not go a single class period without a “juul break” in the bathroom. A city with nothing to do so everyone goes to the valley. Every teenager who lives in Simi Valley dreams of leaving Simi Valley for good. In the 60’s there was a nuclear outbreak very close to Simi, and people are still feeling the effects of the radiation fifty years later even though the government doesn’t want to admit it. Lastly, a mall where even an Apple store couldn’t survive because it kept getting robbed, and was getting no business. In short, Simi Valley is a small city filled with druggies, nicotine addicted teens, and conservatives who have nothing to do past six o’clock.

Teen 1: Let’s do something fun tonight!
Teen 2: Are you stupid? We can’t we live in Simi Valley. Let’s just go Juul in the bathroom.

by Shower Handle February 18, 2019