When your partner doesn’t want to have sex, so when they turn around or roll over, you jerk off all over their back.
by Scotty Nice September 11, 2019

When a man, even though he had a vasectomy, has to pull out in order not to leave his wife dripping for the next 12 hours and she doesn’t want it on her gut. The husband must take an old white undershirt and “tuck it” under her ass, creating a canvas for his man juice.
Fucking Trudie man. I got a vasectomy and she still won’t let me bust up in her puss. I have to use the t shirt tuck so I don’t get it on or in her.
by Scotty Nice October 26, 2019

When your Irish buddy and you go to the park after dark after hitting puberty to jerk off and you end up behind the same bush by accident. He then asks you for assistance with his stiffy.
by Scotty Nice January 14, 2021

When you invite a gay midget to Thanksgiving and indicate which guest’s dick he’s supposed to suck by placing a lit votive under the chair of said “getter” of the fellatio.
I had the weirdest thanksgiving experience yesterday. There was a game called Turkey Day votive and basically they hired a midget to suck a random guest’s dick. It was crazy but I really enjoyed the BJ.
by Scotty Nice November 28, 2024

When your older male friend can no longer see out of his left eye because of receiving a high speed shot of ejaculate directly to his eyeball during his sexual experimentation days. The eye survives for several years until the effect of the impact makes it such that glasses can no longer serve a beneficial purpose.
Damn I got a hummer from that MILF Trudie last night and I'd been saving up my load all week. She didn't want to swallow so when I was about to finish I blasted my goo so hard at her eye I doubt she will be able to see in a few years. She gonna have that Lopey Left Eye.
by Scotty Nice May 16, 2023

When your girl finally agrees to let you in the butt after a grueling quest to convince her and you go so fast before she changes her mind that you jam it in without lube and bend your dick in half, causing a hospital visit and very uncomfortable conversation with the doctor.
Well doctor, you see, Trudie finally agreed to the butt and I went so fast that I forgot the lube and...snap crackle pop...here I am.
by Scotty Nice November 06, 2019

When you and your wife dress up really nice for a classy party, but get too drunk to hump that night. The next morning, you convince her to put the sparkly dress back on, so you can pull it up and do her from behind as if it were the prior evening.
Trudie and I got so drunk last night that we passed out before we could bone. Thankfully, she let me do the reboot-y this morning.
by Scotty Nice December 16, 2019
