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Definitions by Randy Bumgardner

queen mother's grin 

The "U" shaped yellow piss attain around a well used WC. It means any yellow stain on a floor but particularly around a water closet.
We will have to replace this flooring your majesty, the lino around the bog is like the queen mother's grin.

Bathroom Origami 

The delicate and intricate art of folding toilet paper over and over to maximise usage in order to avoid getting shit on your fingers. Practiced especially when there is a dearth of suitable bathroom tissue.
I nearly ran out of bog paper! Lucky I know some bathroom origami.