Ohio driver's definitions

emofunnel

this word is pronounced like emotional, but the "sh" in emotional is replaced with an "f" sound in emofunnel, which is a combination of emotional and funnel and describes a person who is not only emotional but also likes to draw others into her or his web of emotions in the manner of a vortex or a spider lures prey to the inner linings of its web. Like a liquid into a funnel, you are too far in once you're involved with an emofunnel. it can be an adjective or a noun.

--Did Sheila tell you her sob story about how she spilled milk on her wedding dress?

--Yeah, how ironic is that, that she's crying over spilled milk and telling everybody about it. She loves that crap.

--She is such an emofunnel. (Or, alternatively, one could say, She is so emofunnel.)

by Ohio driver January 6, 2012

Gatorfake

This is the phenomenon whereby a person ingests one food or beverage item while thinking of another, which inevitably throws one for a gustatory loop. (The namesake is from the author's own experience of taking a drink of water while looking at and thinking of Gatorade and his subsequent surprise at the lack of slightly syrupy texture and sugary palate punch.)

After my run, I was lookin' in the fridge for somethin' sweet, ya know, to restabilize my blood sugar 'n all's I found was some OJ behind the milk, 'n then I took a swig a my water, totally thinkin' o' that OJ, 'n I was totally gatorfaked.

by Ohio driver October 26, 2012