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Definitions by Mucus Van Merkin

Switkowski 

A small but exceedingly smelly shit which somehow manages to get smeared liberally down the side of the bowl, on the toilet seat, on the floor and out into the hallway.

telstra
We lost our bond because someone dropped a Switkowski and we had to burn the house down.
Switkowski by Mucus Van Merkin January 17, 2007
1. Expensive and inoperative, though claiming to be otherwise.

2. Fucked, broken.

3. Inadequacy masked by incompetence.
Don't buy that, maye mate's got one and it's Telstra.
Telstra by Mucus Van Merkin May 11, 2004