A phenomenon that occasionally occurs in social gatherings that devolve into a nostalgia-fest conversation about fecal incidents such as soiling underwear, quality bowel movement and/or alcohol fueled defecating incidents. Inevitably, the conversation becomes a string of awful fish-stories about large bowel movements and creative placement and/or uses of them. The conversation becomes more and more repugnant at a exponential pace. Ultimately, the least attractive person of the coversation wins with the most horrifically grotesque story about his or her colon meat.
"...Last week, at Joe's bachelor party, Eric told us this story about crapping his pants on the way home from work that week. For some reason, the stripper decided she should become part of the conversation and told a story about how she once deuced through her g-string thereby cutting the turd in two. Eric rebutted by regaling us with a tale of a boat trip where he made some starboard diarrhea or something like that. That touched off about an hour of one upmanshit where each had one less appetizing story after the next...."
by JEUNT November 21, 2009
1. A word used to describe a person with limited social skils or is an otherwise undesirable individual from a personality standpoint. It can be used interchangeably with words like asshole, fuckbucket, shitpurse, tool, numbnuts, etc.
2. A male who is able to attract beautiful women but chooses to hook up with flatsos and other fat broads.
3. An individual who literally has sex with ham.
2. A male who is able to attract beautiful women but chooses to hook up with flatsos and other fat broads.
3. An individual who literally has sex with ham.
1. What the hell? Who's the hamfucker that upper decked my toilet?
2. Q. Why is Bob with that chick? She's a bitch, she's fat and he can do so much better. A. He's a hamfucker, that's why.
3. News Anchor: "In local news, an unidentified male is in police custody for indecent exposure and lewd conduct involving a canned ham at a supermarket..." Witness on camera: "...I saw him open a can of ham and then, well my children started crying..." News correspondant: "...that's disturbing news...back to you Jim..." News Anchor: "that's one sick hamfucker; sports is coming up after the break..."
2. Q. Why is Bob with that chick? She's a bitch, she's fat and he can do so much better. A. He's a hamfucker, that's why.
3. News Anchor: "In local news, an unidentified male is in police custody for indecent exposure and lewd conduct involving a canned ham at a supermarket..." Witness on camera: "...I saw him open a can of ham and then, well my children started crying..." News correspondant: "...that's disturbing news...back to you Jim..." News Anchor: "that's one sick hamfucker; sports is coming up after the break..."
by JEUNT April 15, 2010
A measure of obesity based on the number of chins on a person. It is quoted as a "chindex of..." or "chindex factor of" followed by a number. A single chin (chindex of 1) generally reflects a lack of obesity. A second chin (chindex factor of 2) suggests the individual is overweight. Chindices, the plural of chindex, that are greater than 2 indicate that the individual is a fat mess. A chindex of 0 suggests the individual lacks a jaw, probably from a medical condition or horrific incident. If you have a chindex of 0, you have a fucked-up lookin' face.
Q: Hey, did you hook up with that chick last night? She looked hot but I was pretty liquored up.
A: No, dude you must have been really fucked up. She was gastric-bypass big...she had a chindex of 5.
A: No, dude you must have been really fucked up. She was gastric-bypass big...she had a chindex of 5.
by JEUNT June 09, 2010
1. An awful meal.
2. A food that literally tastes fecal.
3. A complex dish made with painstaking care but has catastrophically disappointing flavor.
4. Absolutely not a delicacy
The term is used so as not to offend the cook. Polite society tells us that it is rude to be brutally honest when asked how enjoyable a particular meal was. Polite society also tells us it is rude to correct someone's mispronounciation of a word. So, while you said "defecacy," he or she will think you meant "delicacy" but will be too polite to correct you. You can be honest say the meal tasted like a shit but the cook will believe you loved it. Everybody wins.
2. A food that literally tastes fecal.
3. A complex dish made with painstaking care but has catastrophically disappointing flavor.
4. Absolutely not a delicacy
The term is used so as not to offend the cook. Polite society tells us that it is rude to be brutally honest when asked how enjoyable a particular meal was. Polite society also tells us it is rude to correct someone's mispronounciation of a word. So, while you said "defecacy," he or she will think you meant "delicacy" but will be too polite to correct you. You can be honest say the meal tasted like a shit but the cook will believe you loved it. Everybody wins.
Q: "...So, did you like the chocolate-marshmallow & cheese meatloaf I made special just for you?"
A: "Uh - yeah, it was a real defecacy."
A: "Uh - yeah, it was a real defecacy."
by JEUNT November 11, 2009