Furry Trout's definitions

Amalgamadage

Successfully botching or combining two cliché’s into one new phrase that makes no sense, but still allows the listener to understand the intended platitude.

Jeffrey coined another classic amalgamadage today. We were talking about trying to minimize the aggravation our customer was experiencing, and he blurts out, “Spite my nose of the very hand that feeds us.” It was an incredible blend of “Cut off your nose despite your face” and “Bite the hand that feeds you.” I was rendered speechless, yet still managed to take copious notes.

by Furry Trout July 12, 2011

Jargonista

A person who is able to use a variety of technical terms to ultimately say nothing meaningful, but somehow still manages to satisfactorily answer questions from senior management, all while sipping a Venti, sugar-free, non-fat, vanilla soy, double shot, decaf, no foam, extra hot, Peppermint White Chocolate Peppermint Mocha with light whip, upside-down, 1 pump of peppermint, 1 and 3/8 pumps vanilla, heavy whip-cream, 3 ice cubes, 1/4 teaspoon Nutmeg sprinkled on top, with green sprinkles, light cinnamon dusted on, stirred, with no lid, double cupped, and a straw

Gary is the ultimate jargonista. He was able to deflect each of Claire's questions with a bunch of mis-used and non-sensical technical terms without spilling his latest barista creation.

by Furry Trout August 14, 2011