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Definitions by Freddy B.

the melts 

Traumatic, instantaneous bodily fluid evacuation, as in liquid shits. Extra care must be taken when cleaning oneself, lest you experience the following secondary conditions:

- swamp ass
- duck butter

Often, ring sting is experienced during an episode of the melts
<running to the nearest bathroom/trash can/bush> "the melts! I got the melts!!!!"
the melts by Freddy B. January 14, 2008