you’re beard is weird 

The highest level roast one can achieve making woman 30 miles radius completely wet. No panties are safe from this sick burn.

Yo dude you’re beard is weird

Damn you got my ass

you’re beard is weird by Bigboinutman October 24, 2018

You need some beard oil 

A rude suggestion for a man with a very stiff and pointy beard, one that could pop balloons and pierce skin. The term will make the man question if his beard is hurting people. Often ends up being repeated until the man shaves his beard.

Amy Adam: God Jack Black, your beard is so pointy. You need some beard oil...
Jack Black: Shut up! I like it the way it is! Stop torturing me!

You need some beard oil by RainbowRunner January 22, 2015

Are you trying to help me grow a beard 

This is a process we’re you let a boy eat your coochie

Are you trying to help me grow a beard

Are you trying to help me grow a beard by anonymous September 12, 2021

If I'd known you were coming, I'd have shaved my beard 

Da "parody on da cake-baking saying" remark dat you smilingly say to a cute chick whom you've unexpectedly met somewhere, and you are savoringly pressing her soft warm palms against yer fuzzy cheeks.

I always love joking around about, "If I'd known you were coming, I'd have shaved my beard" wif pretty girls whom I befriend; said humorous remark always gets da biggest amused giggle-fits outta dem.

If I'd known you were coming, I'd have shaved my beard by QuacksO October 22, 2023