Someone's pissing you off, so much that "kiss my ass" just won't suffice, you can kindly request that they "Lick my tarhoop" - it's just that much more vile.
Tarpooptanner is someone names Tanner and they have tar poops every other day. If you decide to adopt one, make sure you are rich enough to pay for the diaper expenses and for all the plumbing issues. Have fun!!