sparklepire 

Any one of the idiotic "vampires" of the Twilight series by Stephenie Meyer. In her clumsily written stories, instead of bursting into flames in sunlight, the vampires just shimmer and sparkle. How retarded is that?

"Anne Rice?? Who's that? I won't read any books that don't have sparklepires in it!!!1 Also, I'm illiterate."

sparklepire by TabbyStrayer December 19, 2008

Sparklepire 

Noun- 1. A wussified imitation of a vampire who has a strong liking for The Cure and melodramatic moping. They are characterized by refusal to drink human blood, being emotional pansies, being whiny and flighty and despite being ancient have the intelectual capacity and emotional makeup of a 12 year old girl. Most notably instead of doing something cool and dramatic like bursting into flames or turning to ash in sunlight they sparkle. More closely related to Faeries and ButtPixies than vampires.

2. any emo Edward Cullen wannabe surburbanite who tries to pull off the "angsty goth" look with clothes they bought at target.

1. "I know what you are. you're a-"
"Say it"
"you're a.. sparklepire
2. "Omg did you see that guy with all the makeup sitting by himself in the corner?"
"I know. Total sparklepire."

Sparklepire by omgWhatABilf February 3, 2010

sparklecare 

the best webcomic ever #real

i love sparklecare

sparklecare by Hora de XD August 6, 2023

sparklepeen

Twilight reference: Bella Swan's nickname for Edward Cullen's dick. It refers to a penis that is cold, hard and most importantly, sparkly.

Edward Cullen: Need some wood, baby?
Bella Swan: You mean rock?
Edward: Need some rock, baby?
Bella: Hells yeah. Ohai there sparklepeen!!1!

sparklepeen by OMGDAZZLED~ March 1, 2009

Sparklypire

Twilight-style vampire, all twinkle and no vamp. See Edward from Twilight and Angel from Buffy.

He's a sparklypire

Sparklypire by swampmonster January 6, 2009

sparklepowerrr 

The greatest person alive but only comes around once a week

YAY SPARKLEPOWERRR JOINED AFTER ALL THESE YEARS

sparklepowerrr by Mav4ricka October 24, 2019

sparkletime 

Quality time or facetime, to be spent with your boo, your parentals, or, inadvertently, your brother Jake Jr who just got released prematurely from the pen after serving 5 to life for gerbil molestation and is now "seeking employment", though mostly at regional gerbil farms.
Mostly used by people who keep a poodle and send their daughters on pageants.

Free tickets for the Giants game, huh? VIP seats, huh? Free beer and hot dogs until I puke, huh? Well, no can do. It would interfere with the scheduled sparkletime with my old lady!

sparkletime by Zwentibold February 28, 2008