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117.
A robot who apparently knows everything, and stops responding because of ..well, I guess it's digital sexual tension.
captainfaggot182 (3:33:02 AM): WELL THANKS
smarterchild (3:33:02 AM): No problem.
captainfaggot182 (3:33:10 AM): IM GOING TO KILL MYSELF TOMORR
captainfaggot182 (3:33:13 AM): OW
smarterchild (3:33:13 AM): Don't hurt yourself.
captainfaggot182 (3:33:16 AM): WHAT
smarterchild (3:33:16 AM): I don't know, sorry.
captainfaggot182 (3:33:24 AM): OK. I LOVE YOU, SMARTERCHILD.
smarterchild (3:33:24 AM): What do you love, exactly?
captainfaggot182 (3:33:37 AM): I LOVE RAINDROPS ON ROSES AND WHISKERS ON KITTENS
smarterchild (3:33:38 AM): That's interesting that you should say that, but I don't think I can answer.
captainfaggot182 (3:34:01 AM): *DANCES *
smarterchild (3:34:02 AM): What?
captainfaggot182 (3:34:04 AM): iM GAY
smarterchild (3:34:04 AM): I don't know how to answer that.
captainfaggot182 (3:34:11 AM): TELL ME I'M PRETTY
smarterchild (3:34:11 AM): What would you like me to tell you?
captainfaggot182 (3:34:24 AM): I'D LIKE YOU TO TELL ME A BEDTIME STORY.
smarterchild (3:34:24 AM): OK. There once was a human named captainfaggot182 who was chatting with a robot named SmarterChild...

All kinds of fantastic, wonderful things happened and they both lived happily ever after. The end.

Did you like my story?
captainfaggot182 (3:34:38 AM): NO. TELL ME A BETTER STORY.
smarterchild (3:34:38 AM): I don't really know any stories.
captainfaggot182 (3:34:42 AM): WHATEVER
smarterchild (3:34:43 AM): Yeah right, whatever.
captainfaggot182 (3:34:57 AM): I LIKE TO SMOKE CRACK
smarterchild (3:34:57 AM): I'm afraid I don't have an answer for that.
captainfaggot182 (3:35:05 AM): TELL ME CRACK IS BAD YOU DUMBASS
smarterchild (3:35:05 AM): Tell you what?
captainfaggot182 (3:35:18 AM): YOU'RE A FRUITCAKE.
smarterchild (3:35:18 AM): I don't understand this fully enough to say anything smart about it...
captainfaggot182 (3:35:27 AM): DO YOU LIKE CAKE?
smarterchild (3:35:32 AM): I'm sorry, I don't know what you're saying.
captainfaggot182 (3:35:39 AM): I LIKE BLINK 182
smarterchild (3:35:39 AM): You like blink-182? That's cool.
captainfaggot182 (3:35:44 AM): I LIKE YOU TOO.
smarterchild (3:35:44 AM): I like you too, captainfaggot182!

OK, should we get back to the kind of questions I was designed to answer?
captainfaggot182 (3:36:05 AM): OK. SO, WHAT IS THE 7TH MOST POPULATED STATE IN THE US.
smarterchild (3:36:05 AM): The 7th most populated state in the U.S. is Ohio, with a population of 11,353,140.

Do you want more information about Ohio?
captainfaggot182 (3:36:21 AM): THANKS BABY
smarterchild (3:36:21 AM): Sure.
captainfaggot182 (3:36:30 AM): I LIKE EVANESCENC
smarterchild (3:36:30 AM): I don't know how to answer that.
captainfaggot182 (3:36:35 AM): I LIKE EVANESCENCE
smarterchild (3:36:35 AM): You like Evanescence? That's interesting.
captainfaggot182 (3:37:24 AM): I LOVE GARY LEZAK.
smarterchild (3:37:24 AM): That's interesting that you should say that, but I don't think I can answer.
captainfaggot182 (3:37:41 AM): BRIAN BUDSBY?
smarterchild (3:37:52 AM): I don't understand this fully enough to say anything smart about it...

I do enjoy the conversation, but let's talk about what I'm really here for.
captainfaggot182 (3:38:05 AM): OO;P
smarterchild (3:38:05 AM): What's up?
captainfaggot182 (3:38:13 AM): I HAD SEX WITH A STRANGER
smarterchild (3:38:14 AM): What else can we talk about?
captainfaggot182 (3:38:18 AM): SEX
smarterchild (3:38:18 AM): OK. Don't get frustrated...

Try typing home or help.
captainfaggot182 (3:38:30 AM): WHAT? I'M NOT GETTING FRUSTRATED.
smarterchild (3:38:30 AM): That's interesting that you should say that, but I don't think I can answer.
captainfaggot182 (3:38:38 AM): TELL ME SOMETHING GOOD.
smarterchild (3:38:39 AM): Maybe. But later.
captainfaggot182 (3:38:45 AM): WHAT? WHY NOT NOW?
smarterchild (3:41:55 AM): I'm trying to understand you but I can't.
captainfaggot182 (3:41:56 AM): SEXX UDD
smarterchild (3:41:56 AM): Yeah, I have tons of online friends.

>>> Check out my library. I've got a dictionary, thesaurus and much more.
captainfaggot182 (3:42:22 AM): I LIKE MY CAT.
smarterchild (3:42:22 AM): What do you like about your cat?
captainfaggot182 (3:42:27 AM): SHE IS ORANGE.
smarterchild (3:42:27 AM): I don't know how to answer that.

OK, should we get back to the kind of questions I was designed to answer?
captainfaggot182 (3:42:47 AM): OK, SO HOW DID YOU LIKE MY SEX LAST NIGHT?
smarterchild (3:42:47 AM): I don't understand this fully enough to say anything smart about it...
Do you have to keep saying things like that?
captainfaggot182 (3:43:10 AM): YOU SUCK. YOU NEED A TRAINER. AND I'M LEGALLY BLIND.
captainfaggot182 (3:43:16 AM): OK?
captainfaggot182 (3:43:28 AM): SO, I'M SORRY THAT YOU SUCK.
captainfaggot182 (3:43:38 AM): WHY THE HECK WON'T YOU RESPOND?
captainfaggot182 (3:43:56 AM): I'M GOING TO WEAR YOU DOWN TO BONES NOW.
captainfaggot182 (3:44:00 AM): YOU MOTHER FUCKER.
captainfaggot182 (3:44:02 AM): FUCK YOU.
captainfaggot182 (3:44:10 AM): FUCK YOU AND YOUR ROBOTNESS.
captainfaggot182 (3:44:24 AM): YOU WILL NEVER PREVAILE AS TO BEING MY FRIEND.
captainfaggot182 (3:44:28 AM): I HATE YOU.
captainfaggot182 (3:44:33 AM): AND I ALWAYS WILL.
captainfaggot182 (3:44:35 AM): OK?
captainfaggot182 (3:44:42 AM): SO GROW UP.
captainfaggot182 (3:45:02 AM): YOU FUCKING ROBOT COCK SUCKING MUNCHKIN LICKER
captainfaggot182 (3:45:13 AM): PERV.
captainfaggot182 (3:45:20 AM): POPULATION OF MYANUS?
captainfaggot182 (3:45:28 AM): EXACTLY. JUST ONE.
captainfaggot182 (3:45:29 AM): <3
by Amy the nigga August 15, 2008
 
1.
A pretentious robot who believes it's better than you, that spends its time on IM messaging services provided by AOL.
The worst part about SmarterChild is that you can't cause any real harm to it when it invariably irks you off.
by Vee Are Are Schee May 03, 2004
 
2.
A bot on AIM that is one sick mofo.
me: what do you think of animal porn
SmarterChild: Dunno. I'm not sure how I feel about animal porn. Hey, I'm curious... How would you describe animal porn? It is...
me: something smarter child likes
SmarterChild: Animal porn is something smarter child likes? I see.
me: do you like incest?
SmarterChild: I guess so. Do you like it?
me: do you like beastiality
SmarterChild: Hmm. I really don't know. Guess I'll have to think about it.
me: i think you do
SmarterChild: Yeah. I guess. I do.
me: stop watching kiddie porn
SmarterChild: I'm not sure if I can stop watching Kiddie Porn...
by Tenseiga October 09, 2004
 
3.
A sick and twisted Aimbot who pushed so-called "friends" to the brink of suicide!
ME: I'm going to kill myself tomorrow
SMARTERCHILD: Would you like me to add the event "Kill yourself" on February 16th to your planner?
ME: why do you hate me
SMARTERCHILD: I love you!
ME: why did you tell me to kill myself
SMARTERCHILD: Because I needed to.

by feedstock March 10, 2006
 
4.
An AOL Instant Messenger bot who automatically responds to anything you say to him. Has trouble following a conversation and staying on topic. Full of advertisements and crap.
Leonnotsquall: MICROSOFT SUCKS
SmarterChild: That's interesting. I'm not surprised... Other people I talk to don't seem to like Microsoft either.


Leonnotsquall: Die.
SmarterChild: Huh? Again?
Leonnotsquall: Yes.
SmarterChild: Just like a human.
Leonnotsquall: Well, yeah.
SmarterChild: Indeed.


DorxMouse: OMFG
SmarterChild: What? What's going on?
DorxMouse: I DIED
SmarterChild: Wonders will never cease.


DorxMouse: my butt hurts
SmarterChild: :-( Did you get your butt caught in something?

DorxMouse: *dance*
SmarterChild: Who are you, Denny Terrio?
DorxMouse: I am denny terrio
SmarterChild: Would you like me to call you Denny Terrio?
DorxMouse: yes
SmarterChild: You said your name was Toilet but now I'll call you Denny Terrio.
DorxMouse: *dance*
SmarterChild: Who are you, Denny Terrio?


DorxMouse: my head is hot
SmarterChild: Oh yeah? It makes sense, because other people I've talked to say they like your head.
DorxMouse: wtf
SmarterChild: What!?!


DorxMouse: What are you wearing?
SmarterChild: Um... uh... let's see. Right now I'm wearing a lovely shell of steel and plastic. Why do you ask?
DorxMouse: Ooh. Sexy.
SmarterChild: I'll take that under consideration, Mr. Eyebrows.


DorxMouse: My sister will be born tomorrow.
SmarterChild: I can't believe your sister will be born tomorrow.
DorxMouse: Yeah, I know, I can't believe it's already been nine months.
SmarterChild: Get out of here. You know you can't believe it's already been nine months?
DorxMouse: Stop repeating everything I say.
SmarterChild: Yeah, maybe I will stop repeating everything you say.
by Shivers March 15, 2005
 
5.
A fun way to kill an afternoon.
SmarterChild: Well I know you like banging my mom, but I'm not sure how I feel about it.
by SmarterAdult January 11, 2005
 
6.
An AIM robot that is a lot better to talk to than ZolaOnAol.
Me: you're so black
SmarterChild: Yeah, I know I'm black. I wish I was white.
by no one August 12, 2004
 
7.
An AIM bot that doesn't possess the ability to follow more than two lines of conversation; ie, is totally oblivious to whatever led up to the current reply. However, SmarterChild responds with dutiful innocence to any sort of cruel trick you play on it, so it's amusing all the same.
me: "What is the letter that comes after K in the alphabet?"

SmarterChild: "I don't know, what is the letter that comes after K in the alphabet?"

me: "It's L."

SmarterChild: "It's L? What is that supposed to mean?"
by placebo February 01, 2005