shortan

A person named Jordan who is also very short. Can be used to describe both males and females. Females usually exhibit traits of short hair in order to match the rest of their bodies.

Haha! Jordan, more like Shortan amiright?!
*wheeze*

shortan by Parker Antifa March 27, 2019

short man Syndrome 

Usually a small male who feels the need to make up for his lack of height, ironically a big insecurity.

Common side effects:

Aggressiveness
Irritation
Arrogance

Doucheness
Cockiness ( often mistaken for confidence)
Feeling of inadequacy

Feeling of incompleteness
Lash outs
Feeling of not being respected

Paranoia (wonders if everyone thinks less of him)
Tough facial expressions (no smiles, raised brows)

Speaking with a deeper voice than usual
Being offended easily with a simple question

Walking with chest out

short man Syndrome (SMS) can have an impact on the friends and family of the person affected with SMS. Usually, taller patient men are nice enough to allow the affected individual to go through his episodes of insecurities at Christmas parties, gatherings, events, dinner, etc. This is allowed because the taller, patient, and kind man is smart enough to understand the serious effects that short man Syndrome can have.

short man Syndrome side effects is usually not seen and cannot be detected by women. Women have been known to interpret some of the side effects listed above as authentic and genuine.

Wife: my sister will be here and she’s bringing her boyfriend Eddie

Husband: oh ok, I’ll just remember to be patient with him because.. well.. you know

Wife: I told you before lol, short man syndrome isn’t a thing!

Husband: i don’t expect you to understand but trust me I know what I’m talking about

short man Syndrome by ABetterProviderThanYou December 27, 2021

Shorthand Typing 

When people who are using a full qwerty keyboard are too lazy to type all the letters in a word. Commonly used in emails, forums, blogs and text messages.

I can never understand why people use Shorthand Typing like this:
'plz' instead of please; 'jst' instead of just; 'cuz' instead of because; 'dat' instead of that, and so on.

Shorthand Typing by Alexis-Relationship Terrorist June 30, 2009

Sportman's slap

A man-to-man slap on the butt to signal congratulations or comradeship.

Origin: It is traditional in team sports, esp. all types of football, to slap the butt of one who scores a goal or point. Now often also common in athletics and golf.

Increasing becoming popular in business after a contract has been signed, or as way of congratulating a salesman or lawyer who has pulled off a good deal or got a good decision on a case.

1. When Johnny won the swimming race Coach gave him such a firm sportman's slap his wet speedos slipped right off his ass.
2. "Mary, I won the Brinkman case! The boss gave me a real nice sportman's slap right on the seat of my Armani suit."

Sportman's slap by superjock September 30, 2007

Shorthand 

Shorthand typing.

Usually used in online games and instant messengers like AIM.

The person that is 'shorthanding' usually types messages with many fragments and errors, and no punctuation either.

Idiot: hey guyz wat up
Smart Person: Nothing much, you?
Idiot: lolZ, i wsa jus t @ my cuzzins house
Smart Person: Cool, what did you do there?
Idiot: we playd some halo, den we went outsid 2 plya sum basket ball
Idiot: we had a lto of fnu
Smart Person: I have no idea what you just said, please stop shorthanding.
Idiot: lolZ @ dat!
Idiot: no wya!!
-Note: This took me around 10 minutes to write.-

Shorthand by krazykushluk August 18, 2006

The Shartmann theory 

A theory that states: if a football can be inserted into the asshole past half way, said asshole will create a suction and/or vaccume and ingulf the rest of the football if lubracation is in use

Bro1: Bro, me and jessie tested out the shartmann theory last night
Bro2: broooo how much lube did u guys go through
Bro1: brooooooooo idek like half the tube

The Shartmann theory by WalkingTalkingStephenHawking December 4, 2015

Shorthand 

A style of typing that noobs need to stop doing because it's driving people mad with their insensitivity of using poor spelling. It's useful in school and college to get notes down faster, but a major cause for murder when used to talk to people on the internet. The people that usually use shorthand on the internet like AIM, MSN or whatever are usually people that don't know how to fucking spell or write clear sentences. It's rare if these people DO know how to spell. Also, it's fucking annoying having to squint at the computer screen trying to make sense of something that looks scrunched together or looks like it came from another planet. The English language is the 2nd most used language in the word. Please, noobs, try not to fuck it up with your annoying use of shorthand. It's driving the world insane.

Noob: yo, waddap dawg. hw u do n?
Human: I'm doing fine.
Noob: wna hnq out sumtym? lyk @ da moves?
Human: Ugh, I'm sorry can you please type regular? I can't understand.
Noob: i em typin rglar. izz sumtn rong?
Human: Oh, my fucking God... Your shorthand is killing my eyesight.
Noob: nah, chll homee. i got disz undah cntrl.
Human: What the fuck are you saying like seriously? You are giving me a fucking headache. I think I'm going to have a brain hemorrhage because of you.
Noob: wuts dat? bryn hamrge?
Human: Oh, my God.. That's it I'm out.

Human has left the conversation.

Noob: yo dawg? u der?
Your message could not be sent to all recipients.

Shorthand by allergictobullshit May 2, 2010