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A poke in the eye with a sharp stick 

The third choice in a series of options in which the first two have been rejected.
A: "I'm sorry your date cancelled. Do you want to go see a movie?"

B: (sulkily) "No."
A: "Want to go to the club?"

B: "No."
A: "Want a poke in the eye with a sharp stick?"

Better than a poke in the brown eye with a sharp dick 

God this buffet sucks.

Better than a poke in the brown eye with a sharp dick.

you never poke a shark with a stick 

A Metaphor for pissing off someone more powerful then you
Guy 1 / Why did Boss Bertram fire nick?
Guy 2 / he pissed off the boss

Guy 1 / well that is why "you never poke a shark with a stick"

I always share with my buddy 

What you playfully say to a cute chick when either another male chum of yours happens by or you bring said blinky-eyed damsel over and introduce her to him, and so you pass him one of da cutie's hands, feet, etc. so dat he can savor her warm softness, also.
Performing da "I always share with my buddy" routine is easy with any super-pleasant-to-touch/hold body-part dat da chick has two of, such as her hands, feet, boobs, butt-cheeks, etc. Plus of course, you and your pal can always "trade 'n' swap" da gal's sumptuous body-parts, as well, when the two of you are giving her a group-massage/caress --- for example, you can trade da hand dat he's holding for one of her pretty feet dat you're currently rubbing, or you can each knead and suckle one or the other of her ample chest-pillows in turn, so dat you both get equal time giving each of her nipples some lovies with your lips and tongues.

I always share with my buddy 

Da humorously-pleasant phrase dat you smilingly tell a cute lady when you offer one of her delectable-to-handle body-parts (hands, arms, legs, feet, boobs, butt-cheeks, etc.) to a male companion who has accompanied you on your visit to said hot chick.
Performing da "I always share with my buddy" maneuver is a total "win-win" situation for everyone including da gal, since it means dat she will receive twice da soothing massages and/or loving touches dat she would have gotten if just you had been present to savor her warm softness.

share introductions with 

To exchange courtesies with sb, to introduce oneself.
I share introductions with Jon. He seems so nice to me!