Russet Potatoes 

When an old man wears pants that are way too tight and you can see the outline of his junk, resembling russet potatoes, when he crouches or sits. This phenomenon is hard to look away from for some people, as they are baffled by the various shapes created. It's just one of those things that is so nasty that it's hard not to look.

Phil: Hi Eric! (Sits down next Eric)

Eric: Hi Phil, what's up? (Notices the outline of Phil's junk pressed down the side of his leg resembling russet potatoes)

Phil: Just working on my Jabiru. (Eric can't help but look again)

Eric: Oh, how's the work progressing? (Eric looks yet again!)

Phil: Good, I just need someone to weigh the final project for me. (Eric can't hold eye contact any longer, bewildered by why someone would wear pants so damn tight.)

Eric: I've gotta go study for a test. (Eric uses a lame excuse to escape the akward situation, but his eyes are scarred forever.)

Russet Potatoes by jimbo99 December 12, 2009

Russert potato 

(noun) -- (definition 1) a man who has a belly diameter equal to or greater that one half his overall height, thereby possibly making him a high-risk candidate for coronary artery disease, coronary thrombus or perhaps even sudden cardiac death.

(noun) -- (definition 2) the belly of such a person as described in definition 1 of this word.

(So named after the sudden, cardiac death of reknown U.S. journalist Tim Russert on 13 june, 2008. R.I.P. )

When I heard about extreme belly fat being a factor in "sudden cardiac death", I measured my body's lattitude at my belly button. I'm probably not eight feet tall. Therefore, it would behoove me to exercise, eat less junk food and get rid of this Russert potato!

Russert potato by Paul Skinner June 18, 2008