This term defines the akward, then funny, then sad, and finally moment of paranoia, when you realize you've been sitting on the toilet so long; reading, drawing, texting, eating, sleeping, singing, looking on the computer, or having a epiphany, that you genuinely forgot if A: You even took a shit B: Wether you wiped if the previous incident did happen in the first place.
This is often an unnerving experience that can only be solved by checking the bowl to see if there is any "evidence". Don't relax just yet if the bowl check comes back negative. This can be tricky as the phantom shit does exist and will fool an inexperienced shitter into thinking it was a poo dream or day poo dream. Then to be safe one must wipe, even though there is a chance that the poo is non existent and your wrinkled penny will be chafed by unnecessary wiping.
This is often an unnerving experience that can only be solved by checking the bowl to see if there is any "evidence". Don't relax just yet if the bowl check comes back negative. This can be tricky as the phantom shit does exist and will fool an inexperienced shitter into thinking it was a poo dream or day poo dream. Then to be safe one must wipe, even though there is a chance that the poo is non existent and your wrinkled penny will be chafed by unnecessary wiping.
Jimmy: The weirdest thing happened to me the other day.
Steve: What was it man?
Jimmy: I was eating my lunch on the can and then i did some homework, and drifted off. I woke up later and as i went to pull my pants up, I panicked thinking that i had taken a shit and was about to walk without wiping.
Steve: Well did you shit?
Jimmy: I don't know, i checked the bowl, and it was empty but i couldn't shake the feeling that i had taken a shit and it had disappeared, i mean i thought i took a shit but i couldn't remember, and there was no "evidence". How do i know if it was real?
Steve: How do we know if anything is real.... You wiped right?
Jimmy: I DONT KNOW MAN!!!!
Steve: I think you need to have a reality bowl check....
Steve: What was it man?
Jimmy: I was eating my lunch on the can and then i did some homework, and drifted off. I woke up later and as i went to pull my pants up, I panicked thinking that i had taken a shit and was about to walk without wiping.
Steve: Well did you shit?
Jimmy: I don't know, i checked the bowl, and it was empty but i couldn't shake the feeling that i had taken a shit and it had disappeared, i mean i thought i took a shit but i couldn't remember, and there was no "evidence". How do i know if it was real?
Steve: How do we know if anything is real.... You wiped right?
Jimmy: I DONT KNOW MAN!!!!
Steve: I think you need to have a reality bowl check....
by Drockf February 5, 2014