/prə(ʊ)ˈkrasturbert/
verb
past tense : procrasturbated; past participle : procrasturbated

delay or postpone action and masturbate instead; put off doing something and have a wank.

Roger wanted to mow the lawn this afternoon but procrasturbated a couple of times and now has a sore wrist. Hand to gland combat ruins lives...

Procrasturbate by WelshRuffster May 11, 2016

Procrasturbating

Using masturbation to otherwise occupy yourself while pressing matters await.

I had a paper due today, but I spent all night procrasturbating, so fuck that noise.

Procrasturbating by The Middle Man January 29, 2003

Word of the Day on October 16, 2009

procrasturbate

1.) To waste time (procrastinate) by pleasuring oneself (masturbate), putting off other work that one should be doing by masturbating.

2.) To screw oneself (figuratively) by not doing work when one should be.

I had an english paper due, but I spent all day yesterday procrasturbaiting, and boy am I in trouble now.

procrasturbate by spizzman November 30, 2004

Procrasturbation

to delay time by pleasuring yourself.

Due to my night of procrasturbation, I didn't finish that spreadsheet

Procrasturbation by Bernard Bangwanger April 16, 2010

Procrasturbation

1) A port-manteau of procrastination and masturbation.
2) The act of masturbating in order to put off doing something else for as long as possible (not always an intentional practice).

First guy: Did you pay the rent?
Second guy: No, I was too busy masturbating.
First guy: You have to stop your procrasturbation, dude!

Procrasturbation by Information Pete September 16, 2009

procasturbate

to masturbate, so to put doing something off, like cleaning the dishes, or meeting the neighbours.

"For fucks sake Gerald, stop procasturbating and come meet Ada next door."

procasturbate by Biafra J July 26, 2004

God Shot

A chance happening with profound meaning, an unexpected blessing, a "sign".

Dr. Drew on Celebrity Rehab said "All of a sudden what had been just another Hollywood proposal became for him an unexpected blessing, an opportunity for growth. In drug recovery language, that's called a "God shot."

God Shot by Imogen1564 February 25, 2011

Word of the Day on September 18, 2026

city chicken

A food native to Pittsburgh/Western Pennsylvania in which cubes of pork and/or veal are put on a short, wooden skewer, breaded, then baked and/or fried.

I've heard that city chicken originated during the Great Depression, when folks didn't have enough money to buy full cuts of meat, so they assembled meat scraps on a wooden skewer, creating a make-shift drumstick. Hence the name.

Are yinz havin' city chicken for dinner?

city chicken by TRF August 31, 2006

Word of the Day on September 17, 2026

Is that cake?

Another way to say is this fake? Like the show real or cake

“Slayyyter just announced another album last night”
“No way, is that cake?”
“Yeah whoops this isn’t real”

Is that cake? by Sexyyred September 15, 2026

Word of the Day on September 16, 2026

just fokin missing her

native american reservation origin... to miss an ex so badly that everyone can see it.. can be used for either sex eg. just fokin missing her/him

friend : *noticably sad*
me : look at you all sad & shit
friend : shut up!
me : just fokin missing her huh?

just fokin missing her by d i z k o 2 0 8 September 14, 2026

Word of the Day on September 15, 2026

endwarfins

The rush of neurotransmitters and neuropeptides triggered specifically by watching the Seven Dwarfs march home singing "Heigh-Ho" — that particular high of pickaxes, whistling while you work, and communal domestic bliss in a cottage built for men half your height.

I only meant to watch the Heigh-Ho scene for the endwarfins, and then it was two hours later and I'd watched the whole movie.

Endwarfins aren't just a Snow White thing — I get the same hit off the Lollipop Guild in Oz.

endwarfins by Howard Ogden September 13, 2026

Word of the Day on September 14, 2026

caillou

A slang term used to describe a bald person, typically someone who is completely bald or has a closely shaved head. The term is derived from the infamous, hairless kids’ cartoon character of the same name.

Example 1:
“Did you see that caillou over there? His head is reflecting the sun like a disco ball.”
Example 2:
“I think Dave is finally accepting his hair loss. He just went full caillou and shaved the whole thing off.”

caillou by WMH01 September 12, 2026

Word of the Day on September 13, 2026