mattress nips

nipples, which once pressed down, resurface and rise to average nipple height similar to memory foam

dude 1: "damn, yo bitch got sum sleep number lookin ass nips!"
dude 2: "yeah she has them mattress nips that rise, like yeast brother!"

by iusedtobeafish March 3, 2019

Mattress Bra

A bra with so much padding/push up that the extra volume alone is larger than the size of someone's boobs. Mattress bras are usually extremely thick and uncomfortable to wear.

"Dude, this chick I took home last night had MASSIVE TITS. I was so excited until she took off her mattress bra and she went from a DD to a B at best..."

by UrbanDictionaryDoctrine May 30, 2017

Green tea mattress

When you eat healthy and blow your load on the bed, making your partner sleep in the wet spot.

"Don't worry, it's good for your skin, it's a green tea mattress"

"My girl was so mad, I gave her a green tea mattress treatment"

by insanoclan August 30, 2016

mattress lap

An bountifully haired pubic region, usually on a female, with the appearance of a part stuffed mattress.

Uncommon due to the exponential growth of styled pubic depilation amongst the teen and twenty something demographic.

Wow look at that!!

Ya think it's a merkin?

Mebbe, but it is a she is a true Mattress Lap

by Townsman March 13, 2016

Raw mattress

Mattress without any sheets or blankets.

Why are you sleeping on a raw mattress?

Look at this truck driver, he is sleeping on a raw mattress.

by Teacher C March 24, 2019

Mattress Jousting

Yes, it is a game played in college frat parties but has nothing to do with actual jousting. It is the act of two male parteners who are clearly intoxicated partaking in the act of sword fighting (this is where the jousting comes from) with their wangs on a bed (mattress).

It is commonly used as a joke to people who are clearly uninformed about the slang term.

Frat boy: Hey, Jason, do you want to go mattress jousting later on tonight?
Jason: No, I'm not gay
Frat Boy: I am

John's Older Brother: Hey John have you ever gone mattress jousting?
John trying to be cool: Yeah me and steve mattress joust all the time its fun as hell
Steve: I always win
(Arguing over who wins when both are now labeled queers
John's older brother: Wow?

by ogwannabee July 27, 2009

Mattress Tag

When someone is useless like so many matress tags that serve no purpose except to be torn off.

Jill is such a mattress Tag, she gets nothing done.

by Jasonbasinmason July 1, 2020