A sexual act performed when a male, while having sex with a female in either the missionary or more preferably the doggy style position, reaches around his backside and obtains a sizeable amount of sweat from his Perineum (a.k.a. Chode, Brum, Taint, etc.). Said sweat is then wiped upon the females upper lip, directly underneath the nose. The maneuver is completed with the male folding each of his arms to resemble wings, flapping his "wings", and vocalizing an ear-shattering "Quack-Quack".
As Brian was ravishing Krista from the rear and giving her the ultimate in sexual pleasure, Krista suddenly felt Brians finger on her upper lip. Within an instant her olfactory senses were overwhelmed by an extremely foul odor, accompanied by the loud call of the Mallard Duck and a rush of air upon her backside presumably caused by the flapping of limbs. Unbeknownst to Krista, she had received the ultimate sexual insult: The Dirty Mallard!
by Landon M. September 27, 2006
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"Lets mallard slick crystal, she's a noisy cum dumpster!"
by Cody 13 April 24, 2008
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The only op on SADCHUB I'm not afraid to talk to. 14/f/japan no bakas ^____^
"Your absence has caused the hub to degenerate into a negro-filled e-detroit."
by Thermos February 24, 2004
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Used in jobs where you are an instructor. You make this the perfect lesson plan, so when you stop caring about your job and a supervisor shows up to evaluate you, you look awsome.
Key Phrases in George Bush mallard duck speach: freedom, peace, oil
by Matt$ April 8, 2006
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A sex position in which the male hangs upside down by his ankles by a rubber cord attached to the ceiling. The female hangs on with her hands to whatever it is the male is hanging from, and this produces a nice bouncing effect with the rubber cord.

The term comes from the rubber cord used to attach the male's ankles to the ceiling with, and the term "mallard" is due to the fact that the male, when hanging upside down, resembles how a mallard looks when it is being hung upside down after being hunted.

The term is also the inspiration for a famous Ultimate Frisbee team, the "Rubber Mallards"
"What did you do last night?"
"Me and my girlfriend tried out the Rubber Mallard; it was amazing!"
by playa_h&f April 18, 2010
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the act of scraping some duck butter from your grundle
and smearing it on one's face, often under the nose and above the lip, like a dirty sanchez
Joe: what's that on your face?

Bob: that nasty fuck over there just gave me a dirty mallard

Joe:....tisfu
by Blake C. June 16, 2008
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